In many countries today, both men and women need to work full time. Therefore, some people think men and women should share household task equally (e.g. cleaning and looking after children). To what extent do you agree or disagree?

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In recent times
household
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

tasks
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

are
Verb problem
have

There may be a verb use issue here.

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increased. It is a highly debatable issue whether
parents
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

should share
household
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

tasks
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

, or whether it is the women's responsibility.
This
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

essay will outline the benefits of helping each other
in home
Add a hyphen
in-home

It appears that in home is missing a hyphen. Consider adding the hyphen(s).

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activity
Fix the agreement mistake
activities

It seems that activity may not agree in number with other words in this phrase.

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. Working both males and females
togother
Correct your spelling
together

If you don’t want togother to be marked as misspelled in the future, you can add it to your personal dictionary.

has a vital role in social life. It promotes
the
Correct article usage
a

It seems that there is an article usage problem here.

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sense of collaboration between
parents
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

which can lead to
the
Correct article usage
apply

It seems that there is an article usage problem here.

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empathy.
For example
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

, the result of conducted research at Glasgow University illustrates that 90% of
parents
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

live
more happy
Correct word choice
happier

There may be an adjective issue here.

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life
Fix the agreement mistake
lives

It seems that life may not agree in number with other words in this phrase.

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than those who depend only on
the
Correct article usage
apply

It seems that there is an article usage problem here.

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womens
Correct your spelling
women

It appears that the noun womens is misspelled. Correct the spelling.

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.
Furthermore
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

, helping each other
in
Change preposition
with

It seems that preposition use may be incorrect here.

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household
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

tasks
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

may open doors to
explore
Wrong verb form
exploring

It appears that your sentence or clause uses an incorrect form of the verb explore. Consider changing it.

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a new experience. If the men try to cook food,
potentialy
Correct your spelling
potentially

If you don’t want potentialy to be marked as misspelled in the future, you can add it to your personal dictionary.

they will be empowered to cook various types of food.
Thus
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

, they could learn and gain experience from each other.
In addition
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

,
parents
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

can learn to become independent people.
this
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

may
helps
Change the verb form
help

The verb helps after the modal verb may does not appear to be in the correct form. Consider changing the verb form.

show examples
them when they travel abroad.
For instance
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

, my friend Fatma her husband always helps her and now he is self-reliant as he can clean and wash clothes when he
travel
Change the verb form
travels

It appears that the subject pronoun he and the verb travel are not in agreement. Consider changing the verb.

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abroad.
Moreover
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

, the benefits of helping each other
not
Add a missing verb
are not

It seems that you are missing a verb. Consider adding it.

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only limited to
household
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

tasks
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

,
Remove the comma
apply

The comma before the conjunction but appears to be unnecessary. Consider removing it.

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but
also
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

it has
Wrong verb form
have

It appears that your sentence or clause uses an incorrect form of the verb it has. Consider changing it.

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a big impact on saving time. Men and women would often finish their work early and without effort. To illustrate, my sister has enough time to
visite
Correct your spelling
visit

The word visite doesn’t seem to fit this context. Consider replacing it with a different one.

show examples
her
relevents
Correct your spelling
relatives

If you don’t want relevents to be marked as misspelled in the future, you can add it to your personal dictionary.

and shopping
due to
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

her husband's help. So,
this
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

can make the family more
relax
Wrong verb form
relaxed

It appears that your sentence or clause uses an incorrect form of the verb relax. Consider changing it.

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. In conclusion,
boosts
Wrong verb form
boosting

It appears that your sentence or clause uses an incorrect form of the verb boosts. Consider changing it.

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self-esteems
Correct your spelling
self-esteem

The word self-esteems doesn’t seem to fit this context. Consider replacing it with a different one.

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,
gains
Wrong verb form
gaining

It appears that your sentence or clause uses an incorrect form of the verb gains. Consider changing it.

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many skills ,
be
Wrong verb form
being

It appears that your sentence or clause uses an incorrect form of the verb be. Consider changing it.

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independent people and
save
Wrong verb form
saving

It appears that your sentence or clause uses an incorrect form of the verb save. Consider changing it.

show examples
time are all the benefits of sharing
household
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

tasks
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

.
Therefore
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

, the idea of depending only on
womens
Correct your spelling
women
women's

If you don’t want womens to be marked as misspelled in the future, you can add it to your personal dictionary.

shold
Correct your spelling
should

If you don’t want shold to be marked as misspelled in the future, you can add it to your personal dictionary.

be stopped. Both
male
Fix the agreement mistake
males

It seems that male may not agree in number with other words in this phrase.

show examples
and
female
Fix the agreement mistake
females

It seems that female may not agree in number with other words in this phrase.

show examples
should have a
balance
Change the verb form
balanced

The verb balance should be in the participle form when used as an adjective. Consider changing the form of this verb.

show examples
life.

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task achievement
Try to elaborate more on your arguments with additional supporting details. For instance, further explanation on how undertaking household tasks specifically boosts self-esteem and independence would be helpful.
coherence cohesion
Work on the logical structure of your paragraphs to ensure a smoother flow. Some points started abruptly and could benefit from better transitions.
introduction conclusion present
Your introduction sets up the discussion well by addressing the two viewpoints and stating what the essay will cover.
supported main points
You've used relevant examples to support your arguments, which strengthens your essay and makes it more relatable.
introduction conclusion present
The conclusion aptly summarizes the key points discussed in the essay, reinforcing your stance.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

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