IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 2.5

Higher education could be funded in three ways. all costs paid by government, all costs paid by students or student paying all costs through a government loan. what are the advantages of these choices?

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Introduction
higher
education
Use synonyms
is become
Change to the active voice
becomes
has become
show examples
 an important
aspects
Correct the article-noun agreement
aspect
show examples
for
Change preposition
of
show examples
socity
Correct your spelling
society
development
Use synonyms
 where it requires
funds
Use synonyms
 to start and complete the needed
high
Correct word choice
higher
show examples
education
Use synonyms
 certifications.
Body paragraph 1
firstly
Linking Words
, when governments provide the required
funds
Use synonyms
 for high
education
Use synonyms
, they will directly contribute to
Use synonyms
development
Add an article
the development
show examples
 of the
county
Correct your spelling
country
show examples
,
this
Linking Words
 will
be
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
defintly
Correct your spelling
definitely
helps
Correct subject-verb agreement
help
show examples
 students as a golden opportunity for them to grant high degree
ceritifcations
Correct your spelling
certifications
certification
 with no cost
on
Change preposition
to
show examples
 them.
Body paragraph 2
however
Linking Words
, if the
high
Correct word choice
higher
show examples
education
Use synonyms
 study
need
Change the verb form
needs
show examples
 to be provided by the student himself, the candidate will have sort of freedom
on
Change preposition
to
show examples
completion
Replace the word
complete
show examples
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
this
Linking Words
 certification
on
Change preposition
at
show examples
 his
convenant
Correct your spelling
convenient
covenant
 time without government restrictions on the completion period of the
education
Use synonyms
 period.
Body paragraph 3
on the other hand
Linking Words
, if the
funds
Use synonyms
 came
a
Change preposition
from a
show examples
loan from
government
Add an article
the government
show examples
 to
Add an article
the student
a student
show examples
student
Fix the agreement mistake
students
show examples
,
this
Linking Words
 will
be
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
defintly
Correct your spelling
definitely
makes
Correct subject-verb agreement
make
show examples
 the process
stramlined
Correct your spelling
streamlined
 on both
government
Correct article usage
the government
show examples
 and
students
Change noun form
students'
student's
show examples
 goals toward civilization
development
Use synonyms
.
this
Linking Words
 will
eventully
Correct your spelling
eventually
leads
Change the verb form
lead
show examples
 to
boost
Correct article usage
a boost
show examples
Change preposition
in achiving
show examples
achiving
Correct your spelling
achieving
 both
stakeholders
Change noun form
stakeholder's
stakeholders'
show examples
 goals.
Conclusion
in
conclution
Correct your spelling
conclusion
, the three methods of
funds
Use synonyms
 are helping
deffrent
Correct your spelling
different
 aspects of the
country
Change noun form
country's
show examples
development
Use synonyms
 and will lead to the same result of obtaining the required
high
Correct word choice
higher
show examples
education
Use synonyms
ceritifcation
Correct your spelling
certification
 within
Correct article usage
a varity
show examples
varity
Correct your spelling
variety
 of time
period
Fix the agreement mistake
periods
show examples
.

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task response
Try to elaborate more on each of the funding methods with specific and clear examples to provide a more comprehensive argument.
coherence cohesion
Work on the logical flow of paragraphs. Ensure that each paragraph transitions smoothly into the next one and that sentences within each paragraph are logically connected.
coherence cohesion
There are several grammar and spelling mistakes. Special attention should be paid to common errors such as 'socity' instead of 'society' and 'defintly' instead of 'definitely'.
introduction conclusion
You have attempted to introduce the topic and summarize the benefits of each funding method in your conclusion, which shows an understanding of essay structure.
Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

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