In many countries nowadays, consumers can go to a supermarket and buy food produced all over the world Do you think this is a positive or negative development?

#countries #consumers #supermarket #food #world #development

Correct the article-noun agreement

apply

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recent times, it has become common for

people

to visit supermarkets and get

food

that is

imported from different parts of the world. With globalization, it's easier than ever, for

people

to buy

food

from different parts of the world.

While

that brings many advantages, it

also

raises some drawbacks. In

this

essay, I will discuss both the

benefirs

Correct your spelling

benefits

and potential issues of

this

trend. One main advantage of being able to buy

food

from around the globe is the variety of

this

offer.

People

can enjoy fruits, vegetables, and other foods that may not be in

locally

Change the adverb

local

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shops, because of climate or

seasom

Correct your spelling

season

This

gives consumers more options and can

also

improve their diets.

For example

people

in cold regions can have fresh tropical fruits during the winter months.

Additionally

this

global

food

trade helps connect economies, giving farmers in developing countries the chance to sell their goods.

However

, there are

also

challenges with relying on global

food

delivery. Transporting

food

across long distances increases carbon emissions, which

harmful

Add a missing verb

is harmful

show examples

for

Change preposition

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the environment.

This

practice

also

raises

worryabout

Correct your spelling

worry about

food

security, as

country

Add an article

a country

the country

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that depends too much on foreign

food

might struggle if global delivery chains are disrupted.

Furthermore

, it may hurt local farmers who might not be able to compete with cheaper, imported

goodd

Correct your spelling

goods

. In conclusion,

while

the global trade of

food

brings more choices for consumers and supports international economies, it

also

creates environmental challenges and potential risks for local farmers. Balancing

this

Correct determiner usage

these

show examples

factors is very important for the future of

food

systems worldwide.

Submitted by a.seytzhanova on Sat Sep 14 2024

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coherence and cohesion

Try to use a few more linking words and phrases for smoother transitions between ideas. This will enhance the logical flow of your essay.

task achievement

Take care to avoid small grammatical errors, such as subject-verb agreement and correct word forms. Proofreading can help catch these mistakes.

task achievement

Including a few more specific examples can strengthen your argument and illustrate your points more effectively. Try to relate a couple of your main points to real-world scenarios or data.

coherence and cohesion

The essay has a clear structure with an introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion, which makes it easy to follow.

task achievement

You have presented both sides of the argument and provided a balanced discussion, which demonstrates an understanding of the topic.

task achievement

Your ideas are clearly expressed, with good use of vocabulary and varied sentence structures. This makes your writing engaging and comprehensible.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

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8Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
10Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

257 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

6.5

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

6.5

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.5

7.5

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

6.5

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

nutrition
cultural exposure
competitive markets
economic boost
employment opportunities
carbon footprint
environmental impact
local produce
food security
global supply chain
sustainable practices
consumer choice
market dynamics
price competition
agricultural sector

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In many countries nowadays, consumers can go to a supermarket and buy food produced all over the world Do you think this is a positive or negative development?

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Some people believe that it is best to accept a bad situation, such as an unsatisfactory job or shortage of money. Others argue that is better to try and improve such situations. Discuss both these views and give you own opinion.

In many countries around the world, rural people are moving to cities, so the population in the countryside is decreasing. Do you think this is a positive or a negative development?

Nowadays, a growing number of people with health problems are trying alternative medicines and treatments instead of visiting their usual doctor. Do you think this is a positive or a negative development?

Nowadays, more and more people no longer read newspapers or watch TV programmes to get news. They get news about the world through the Internet. Is this a positive or negative development?