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Writing Samples
Band 7

The graph below shows the average monthly change in the prices of three metals during 2014. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevan

The graph below shows the average monthly change in the prices of three metals during 2014. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevan
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The line graph illustrates information about the average
price
Use synonyms
changes
Use synonyms
 of three
kind
Change to a plural noun
kinds
show examples
 of metals (Copper, Nickel, and Zinc) from January to December 2014.
Overall
Linking Words
, the
change
Use synonyms
 in value of Nickel and Copper decreased,
while
Linking Words
 Zinc’s
price
Use synonyms
changes
Use synonyms
 experienced
a
Remove the article
apply
show examples
growth throughout the given period.
Moreover
Linking Words
, the
price
Use synonyms
 gap between
three
Correct article usage
the three
show examples
 metals narrowed by the end of 2014. In terms of metal with the highest value
changes
Use synonyms
 in the first period, Nickel accounted for 6%. The
change
Use synonyms
 in
price
Use synonyms
then
Linking Words
 experienced a dramatic decrease to 1% in March before falling gradually and hitting the through at -3% in June. In the second half of 2014, it experienced a fluctuation followed by a moderate growth to 1% in Nov and remained at the same level until the end of the period.
On the other hand
Linking Words
, the
change
Use synonyms
 in the value of Copper made up 2% in Jan before dropping gradually to just below 0% in June. The figure
then
Linking Words
 increased steadily
at
Change preposition
to
show examples
 just below 2% in December. The remaining metal, Zinc, had a 1%
price
Use synonyms
change
Use synonyms
 in January. Zinc’s
price
Use synonyms
changes
Use synonyms
then
Linking Words
 experienced
a
Remove the article
apply
show examples
significant growth and peaked at 3% in February, before falling gradually in June. The figure remained steady over five months, followed by a dramatic rise to 2% in December. By the end of 2014, Zinc had the highest level of
price
Use synonyms
changes
Use synonyms
 compared to other metals.

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words price, changes, change with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: The word "figure" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "figure" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "changes" was used 9 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "decreased" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "fall" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "growth" was used 3 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "remained" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "just below" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "gradually" was used 3 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "dramatic" was used 2 times.
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