With the development of social media, more and more youngsters are being allowed unsupervised to the internet in order to meet and chat with friends, which can lead to potentially dangerous situations. What solutions can you suggest to deal with this problem?

#development #media #youngsters #internet #chat #friends #situations

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Currently, there is an increasing number of adolescents who are able to meet and chat with friends online in an unsupervised way, and it could lead to potentially dangerous problems.

Parents

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monitoring and

well developed

Add a hyphen

well-developed

show examples

Internet

Use synonyms

chatting environment could deal with

this

Linking Words

problem

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It is clear that

Linking Words

chatting online is a way for

teenagers

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to make friends, especially for introverts.

However

Linking Words

, most

Change preposition

apply

show examples

youngsters do not have critical thinking and awareness of privacy and security.

Internet

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offer

Change the verb form

offers

show examples

the condition for people to hide their real personal information, so that scammers could find out

teenagers

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and make up their profiles to pretend to be peers with

teenagers

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online, and

teenagers

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could be cheated by scammers easily.

In addition

Linking Words

, the

Internet

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is a virtual environment,

teenagers

Use synonyms

would idealize

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

online

Use synonyms

relationship

Fix the agreement mistake

relationships

show examples

and they would invest a lot of

time

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to deal with online social and online friendships. Family plays a significant role in dealing with

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

online

relationship

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problems.

Parents

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could set screen usage

timer

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timers

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for their

child

Fix the agreement mistake

children

show examples

and control their screen

time

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this

Linking Words

could ensure that teens would not spend too much

time

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online.

In addition

Linking Words

parents

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should set an example for them,

beacuse

Correct your spelling

because

they are role

model

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models

show examples

Change preposition

for

show examples

their

child

Fix the agreement mistake

children

show examples

Moreover

Linking Words

, parental support is not enough, establishing a variety of social support

system

Fix the agreement mistake

systems

show examples

is another way to deal with the

problem

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. It is crucial to strengthen the

monitor

Replace the word

monitoring

show examples

of the

Internet

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chatting system by banning

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

negative words and other methods.

Besides

Linking Words

schools

Fix the agreement mistake

school

show examples

support is important too. Teachers could organise more campus activities to build up

students

Fix the agreement mistake

student relationships

show examples

relationship

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Also

Linking Words

, they could help students to solve the mental problems on

time

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In conclusion,

teenagers

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make friends online because they find it difficult to get a healthy

relationship

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from

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

real life. To deal with

this

Linking Words

problem

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, not only comprehensive monitoring systems could solve the

problem

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, but

also

Linking Words

enough care and conversation from

parents

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and society are

both

Correct pronoun usage

apply

show examples

important.

Submitted by janejaspar on Tue Sep 17 2024

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task achievement

Try to provide more specific examples to support your points, such as particular instances or studies that illustrate the dangers of unsupervised internet use for teenagers.

coherence cohesion

Ensure a clearer logical progression between sentences and paragraphs to enhance the coherence of your essay.

coherence cohesion

You have structured the essay well, with a clear introduction and conclusion.

task achievement

Your response addresses the key points of the prompt, providing solutions and explanations for the proposed issues.

Answer the 'Problem and Solution' topic

Problem-and-solution essays fall naturally into two parts, the first describing and exploring the problem, the second setting out the solution or solutions.

You essay structure should look something like this:

Introduction
Body paragraph 1 – Problems
Body paragraph 2 – Solutions
Conclusion

Examples to start your body paragraph:

One of the first problems of the...
Another problem that needs to be considered...
A possible solution to this problem would be...
One immediate practical solution is to...

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

7
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
6
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
19
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

317 words

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With the development of social media, more and more youngsters are being allowed unsupervised to the internet in order to meet and chat with friends, which can lead to potentially dangerous situations. What solutions can you suggest to deal with this problem?

Answer the 'Problem and Solution' topic

You saw an advert in the newspaper asking for volunteers to help run a charity event. Write a letter of application to the organizers. In your letter: -explain why you are interested in helping -Give details suitable past experience -suggest ways you might help with the event.

Museums are often thought to be boring, and many people perceive visiting them a waste of time. What do you think is the importance of museums, and how can they be made intersting?

Nowadays many teenagers choose to be self-employed, rather than to work for a company or organization. Why might this be the case? What could be the disadvantages of being self-employed?

Some people think that sports involving violence, such as boxing and martial arts, should be banned from TV as well as from international sporting competitions. To what extent do you agree?

In some countries, owning a home rather renting one is more important for people. Why might this be the case? Do you think this a positive or a negative development?