The table presents how much people from five employment sectors earned, in three different salary levels in 2009. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

#people #five #employment #sectors #three #salary #levels #summarise #information #features #comparisons

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The table shows information about people from different types of employment in three various wage levels in

years

Correct article usage

the years

show examples

2009.

Overall

Linking Words

, it can be seen that finance has

Change the article

the

show examples

highest salary among others and its minimum

Linking Words

also

Add a missing verb

is also

show examples

really high. Meanwhile, hospitality

become

Change the verb form

becomes

show examples

sector

Add an article

a sector

show examples

with

lowest

Correct article usage

the lowest

show examples

maximum and construction be

Change the article

the

show examples

least minimum.

In addition

Linking Words

, the average was around 1895 until 5225

euro

Use synonyms

Firstly

Linking Words

, finance has a big wage with

total

Correct article usage

a total

show examples

8850

Change preposition

of 8850

show examples

Use synonyms

euro

Fix the agreement mistake

euros

show examples

while

Linking Words

its minimum was 1600.

Aditionally

Correct your spelling

Additionally

, the average was 5225. On the other

sides

Fix the agreement mistake

side

show examples

, transportation was a sector that

has

Wrong verb form

had

show examples

salary

Correct article usage

a salary

show examples

about

Change preposition

of about

show examples

4580 and the minimum was 843

Use synonyms

euro

Fix the agreement mistake

euros

show examples

. Not only that, but

also

Linking Words

the average

Add a missing verb

is as

show examples

much as 2712

Use synonyms

euro

Fix the agreement mistake

euros

show examples

Besides

Linking Words

construction's

Change noun form

construction

show examples

workers

has

Change the verb form

have

show examples

income

Correct article usage

an income

show examples

approximately

Change preposition

of approximately

show examples

3100

euro

Use synonyms

as well as

Linking Words

the

Correct article usage

show examples

minimum

was

Wrong verb form

show examples

790.

Besides

Linking Words

that, the average was 1945.

Furthermore

Linking Words

manufacturing's

Change noun form

manufacturing

show examples

staffs

Fix the agreement mistake

staff

show examples

can

earning

Change the verb form

earn

be earning

show examples

up to 3500

Use synonyms

euro

Fix the agreement mistake

euros

show examples

also

Linking Words

the minimum was 930. Not

forget

Verb problem

apply

show examples

be mentioned

Wrong verb form

mention

show examples

, the average was still high until

reach

Wrong verb form

reached

show examples

2215

Use synonyms

euro

Fix the agreement mistake

euros

show examples

Linking Words

Last

Change the article

The last

show examples

job, people who work in hospitality can gain revenue at 2900

Use synonyms

euro

Fix the agreement mistake

euros

show examples

along with

Linking Words

its minimum

Change preposition

apply

show examples

which 890. Even, the average was big at 1895

Use synonyms

euro

Fix the agreement mistake

euros

show examples

Submitted by wishmeluck on Wed Sep 18 2024

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "also, besides".

▼

Vocabulary: Replace the words euro with synonyms.

▼

Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "information" in your introduction.

▼

Vocabulary: The word "about" was used 2 times.

▼

10
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
36
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Single idea per paragraph

Introduction & conclusion present

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 9.0

Complete response

Suitable writing tone

Appropriate word count

3 paragraphs

189 words

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The table presents how much people from five employment sectors earned, in three different salary levels in 2009. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Many countries offer a free health care system to their citizens rather than relying on private health care. Discuss the advantages and disadvantages of having a free system, and give your opinion.

Some people think that success in life comes from hard work and determination, while others think that there are more important factors such as money and appearance. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

Nowadays many people complain that they have difficulties getting enough sleep. What problems can lack of sleep cause? What can be done about lack of sleep?

Students should pay the full cost for their own study, because university education benefits individuals rather than society. To what extend do you agree or disagree.

ome families send their children to a foreign country to be educated. Discuss both the advantages and disadvantages of this course of action. Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.