Solving environmental problems should be the responsibility of an international organization rather than each national government. Do you agree or disagree?
It is argued that solving environmental problems should be the responsibility of an international organization,
while
others think that each national government must solve their problems themselves. I agree that the international organization's solutions are the best in the world
because of the higher possibility of conflicts
and the fewer
Fix the agreement mistake
less trade
trades
between countries
.A commonly held belief is that worldwide organizations should solve most of the challenges in the world
, and one reason for this
is many
Correct article usage
the many
conflicts
between countries
in our world
. According to
scientists, there are about
billions of useful minerals in our galaxy, and there are many Change preposition
apply
countries
that want these minerals for themselves. Furthermore
, there will be some little conflicts
between each other for these materials, and then
these little conflicts
will lead to the biggest wars. For instance
, the reason for the war called Orbulaq was that the nation called Jongar wanted to conquer the location of the country called Qazaq. Because in this
place there was a wonderful and comfortable nature for all creatures and people.Then
, the second reason for that statement is
Change the verb form
is traded
is trading
trades
. According to
politics, 30 percent
of Change the spelling
per cent
trades
were stopped by betrayal. However
, I admit that if international organizations decide trade
between Fix the infinitive
to trade
countries
, everything will be alright
and Replace the word
all right
honestly
. One clear example is a commercial between a father of mine and his friend. My father wanted to buy a TV, and Change the word
honest
then
his friend told him that he could buy it
from him the newest TV for the cheapest cost. Meanwhile, we did not know that his friend was lying to us. After that, my dad gave his money to him because he believed in him. Correct pronoun usage
apply
Finally
, and sadly, he betrayed us and told us that he would not give that
television.
In conclusion, I totally agree with the statement that says that global Correct pronoun usage
us that
commitees
must solve all problems of the Correct your spelling
committees
world
, and the reasons for that are fights and battles between countries
and betrayal trades
.Submitted by bizhanalikhan6 on
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task achievement
Your introduction effectively sets up the discussion and states your position clearly. However, some of your ideas are not fully developed and need more specific examples or explanations to clarify your points.
task achievement
Try to expand on your examples and ensure they are relevant and specific to the point you're making. For instance, the example involving your father and his friend is a bit too personal and could be replaced with a more general or widely known scenario.
coherence cohesion
The essay is generally logically structured, but there are areas where the flow of ideas could be improved. Work on ensuring that each paragraph has a clear main idea supported by relevant details.
coherence cohesion
Use clear transition words and phrases to link your ideas smoothly and help the reader follow your argument more effectively.
task achievement
Your introduction is clear and provides a solid foundation for your essay.
introduction conclusion present
You have included a conclusion that effectively summarizes your main points and restates your position.
Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
The easiest way to score well on the IELTS Task 2 writing portion is to structure your writing in a solid essay format.
A strong argument essay structure can be split up into 4 paragraphs, each containing 4 sentences (except the conclusion paragraph, which only contains 3 sentences).
Stick to this essay structure:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
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