Health services are a basic necessity. However, private companies have made them quite costly for ordinary individuals. Do the advantages of private health care outweigh its disadvantages?

#health #services #necessity #companies #individuals #care

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a fact that private

healthcare

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is ubiquitous worldwide.

Although

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health

facilities

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are a vital need for individuals, private organizations charge high

cost

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costs

show examples

for common people. I believe the benefits of

this

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proposition are more than the drawbacks for valid reasons.

To begin

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with, one significant merit

for

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show examples

private

hospitals

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show examples

giving costly

treatment

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that

Correct word choice

apply

show examples

the shorter waiting time.

For example

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canadian

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Canadian

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government

hospitals

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arrange an appointment after three or four months for any

healthcare

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conditions,

while

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walk-in

clincs

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clinics

schedule an appointment for

Correct article usage

the

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next day.

This

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is because private companies request a high payment from patients,

this

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money

they

Correct pronoun usage

apply

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could

use

Wrong verb form

be used

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to expand their

facilities

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by hiring more

staffs

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staff

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and occupying more space for a clinic, which leads to less waiting time.

Furthermore

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, people have a greater choice in private clinics, as they

have

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are

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freeome

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free

to choose their

healthcare

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providers including specialists because of the

high cost

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high-cost

show examples

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treatment

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of treatment

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While

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it cannot be denied that

over

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apply

show examples

treatment

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protocole

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protocol

is a significant drawback of private health industries.

This

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can be

ealily

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easily

avoided by consulting more than one

healthcare

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professionals

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professional

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and

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the patient

a patient

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patient

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patients

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can

also

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research

about

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apply

show examples

their problems on the

highly

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high

show examples

source internet.

Moreover

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, independent

facilities

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often offer advanced medical

treatment

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and technologies which is not available in publicly owned

hospitals

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For instance

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, physiotherapy clinics in Canada provide advanced pain relief modalities,

while

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government

hospitals

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only have basic

treatment

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protocols. The reason for

this

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is that private clinics charge more money for the

treatment

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compare

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compared

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to public

facilities

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which give free

treatment

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. In conclusion,

while

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non-public

hospitals

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create over

treatment

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methods, I firmly believe that these places give shorter wait

time

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times

show examples

, provide better quality of care and

also

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show multiple options to choose our

treatment

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plans.

Submitted by parmarheena277254 on Wed Sep 18 2024

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grammar

Improve grammar and spelling by carefully proofreading your work. For example, 'healthcare' should be one word, 'clincs' should be 'clinics,' and 'freome' should be 'freedom.'

examples

Focus on providing clearer and more specific examples. For example, instead of saying 'government hospitals arrange an appointment after three or four months,' you could specify the type of treatment this applies to.

cohesion

Ensure smooth transitions between ideas to improve overall coherence. For instance, you could use transitional phrases like 'also,' 'in addition,' or 'moreover' to connect your points seamlessly.

structure

You have presented a well-structured essay with a clear introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion. This demonstrates a good understanding of essay structure.

examples

Your main points are relevant and supported by examples, which shows a good grasp of the topic.

cohesion

You maintained a clear and consistent argument throughout the essay.

Answer the 'Advantages and Disadvantages' topic

IELTS advantages and disadvantages questions normally give you a statement and ask you to comment on the advantages and disadvantages of that statement.

Answer structure for the type of essay

Introduction
Body paragraph 1 – advantages
Body paragraph 2 – disadvantages
Conclusion

Examples to start your body paragraph:

The main advantage is...
The disadvantage of this...
The main benefit...
Despite these advantages...
One possible drawback...

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

9
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
4
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
25
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

287 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

cutting-edge technology
highly skilled professionals
patient experience
outcomes
personalized care
healthcare practitioners
competition
standards
government burden
public funds
prohibitively expensive
disparities
profitability
over-treatment
neglect
non-profitable cases
ethical concerns
financial status

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Health services are a basic necessity. However, private companies have made them quite costly for ordinary individuals. Do the advantages of private health care outweigh its disadvantages?

Answer the 'Advantages and Disadvantages' topic

Some people believe that it is best to accept a bad situation, such as an unsatisfactory job or shortage of money. Others argue that it is better to try and improve such situation. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

Some people want the government to spend more money for looking life on other planets; however, others think that it is a waste of public money when there are so many problems on earth that the government should be solving. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

some people say free time activities for children should be organized by parents. others say that children should be free to choose what they do in free time. Dicuss both views and give your opinion.