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Band 4.5

some people think it is better to educate boys and girls in seperate schools , others however believe that boys and girls benefit more from attending mixed schools . discuss both these view and give your own opinion this the question i will provide an essay to evaluate

#people #boys #girls #seperate #schools #benefit
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Nowadays, individuals often engage in debates about their beliefs and traditions. One of these discussions
centers
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 around whether youngsters should study in mixed or separate institutions. In my view, educating
students
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 in mixed schools provides a realistic experience for their future professional and personal lives, enhancing their social intelligence and communication skills. On one hand, some argue that mixed education can negatively impact
students
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’
behavior
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. They suggest that the presence of both genders may lead to distractions, particularly during the tumultuous teenage years when hormonal and emotional changes occur. Increased instances of romantic relationships can divert attention from academics, as
students
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 may prioritize social interactions over their studies.
Furthermore
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, concerns about increased violence in mixed settings are often cited as evidence against coeducation.
Conversely
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, many believe that educating boys and girls together broadens their horizons and develops essential life skills. Exposure to a diverse community helps
students
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 learn to navigate relationships with the opposite gender, a crucial skill in both personal and professional contexts. By interacting in a mixed environment,
students
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 can better understand different perspectives and cultivate mutual respect, which are vital for fostering a harmonious society. In conclusion, mixed schools are beneficial when
students
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 are supervised and guided effectively. The interactions between boys and girls can enhance their social
behavior
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 and contribute to their personal development. Ultimately, preparing
students
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 for the complexities of real life makes mixed education a valuable choice.
Submitted by hindgadeem123 on

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task achievement
Your essay addresses both views as required and presents a clear opinion. However, including specific examples to support your points would enhance the depth and persuasiveness of your arguments.
coherence cohesion
The logical structure of your essay is strong, and your ideas flow coherently from one paragraph to the next. However, consider adding more transitions between sentences to further improve the coherence.
coherence cohesion
Your introduction is clear and sets up the essay well, and your conclusion effectively summarizes the main points and reinforces your opinion.
task achievement
Your essay covers the task requirements comprehensively and delivers clear, well-rounded ideas.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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