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Band 5

ome university students want to learn about other subjects in addition to their main subjects. Others believe it is more important to give all their time and attention to studying for a qualification. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

#ome #university #students #subjects #addition #time #attention #qualification
Some would argue that Becherlar Degree
students
 should have extra
classes
 in other
subjects
,
while
 others think
that is
apply
Verb problem
apply
show examples
essential to focus and prepare to pass their college exams.
However
, I believe that learning only one speciality
would be
Wrong verb form
is
show examples
 not enough,
students
 need to attend more general
classes
. Learning about only one subject would not let the
students
 gain all the
knowledge
 they need in their lives people who studied and focused on their speciality only do not have a lot of experience, an older brother can not guide his siblings studying a different
subjects
 than him and the reason is the lack of
knowledge
 that he has.
For example
, a study by Hail Univesity showed that 36% of
students
 need to improve in basic life requirements.I believe that
students
 must not give all of their time
in
Change preposition
to
show examples
 a single speciality.
On the other hand
,
students
 who want to gain more general
knowledge
 are planning to attend
thier
Correct your spelling
their
classes
 plus more basic
classes
 or workshops. By increasing
thier
Correct your spelling
their
 to
subjects
students
 will end up helping the community to be more educated.
For instance
, medical
students
 need to understand more about leadership because they are the smartest people in the community.I agree with
this
 idea and the reason is we need more talented people and by increasing the general
knowledge
 of the community we will achieve it . In conclusion, studying only one subject is not as
Important
Fix capitalization
important
show examples
 as studying multiple
subjects
.I believe that universities need to allow the
students
 to attend different
classes
.
Submitted by rayan.mataq on

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coherence cohesion
Improve the logical flow of the essay by organizing your points more clearly. Use paragraphing effectively to separate different ideas.
coherence cohesion
Ensure that the introduction outlines both perspectives clearly and sets up the thesis statement effectively.
task achievement
Develop your main points more comprehensively with clear explanations and relevant, specific examples.
task achievement
Address any grammatical errors and ensure that your sentences are clear and concise. This will improve the readability and effectiveness of your argument.
task achievement
You have a clear understanding of both perspectives regarding the topic, which shows a balanced approach.
coherence cohesion
The conclusion effectively summarizes your opinion and the main points discussed in the essay.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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