IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6.5

The line graph and pie chart below show band information on crime in the UK for the last year. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The line graph and pie chart below show band information on crime in the UK for the last year. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
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The line graph illustrates the relationship between
age
Use synonyms
 and
crime
Use synonyms
last
Linking Words
 year in the UK,
while
Linking Words
 the pie chart shows the proportion of which type of
crime
Use synonyms
 was committed
at
Change preposition
in
show examples
 the same period.
Overall
Linking Words
, the most committed
crime
Use synonyms
 in the UK was
violations
Fix the agreement mistake
violation
show examples
crime
Use synonyms
by
Change preposition
apply
show examples
under
than
Change preposition
apply
show examples
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
half of the total
crimes
Use synonyms
 in the whole country by 46 per cent.
Which
Correct pronoun usage
This
show examples
 mostly
happend
Correct your spelling
happened
happen
by
Change preposition
to
show examples
teenegers
Correct your spelling
teenagers
 from
Use synonyms
age
Correct article usage
the age
show examples
20
Change preposition
of 20
show examples
 to 24. Property and drug
crimes
Use synonyms
 are similar in proportion with 23% and 22%.
While
Linking Words
 the least type of
crime
Use synonyms
 committed was public order by only 9 per cent. In regard to the relationships between
age
Use synonyms
 and
crime
Use synonyms
, there
were
Change the verb form
was
show examples
 a dramatic increase in
crimes
Use synonyms
 from
age
Use synonyms
 12
by
Change preposition
apply
show examples
almost near
to
Change preposition
apply
show examples
zero, to reached 70
thousands
Fix the agreement mistake
thousand crimes
show examples
crime
Use synonyms
 by
Use synonyms
age
Correct article usage
the age
show examples
 of 16.
However
Linking Words
, it reached its peak at
age
Use synonyms
 21
by
Change preposition
with
show examples
 more than 80 thousand
crimes
Use synonyms
. Following that, it went down to nearly 20
thousands
Change to singular
thousand
show examples
crimes
Use synonyms
 at
Use synonyms
age
Correct article usage
the age
show examples
 of 28.
Then
Linking Words
 it started to decrease slowly as the
age
Use synonyms
 rates
increase
Wrong verb form
increased
show examples
.

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "while".
▼
Vocabulary: Replace the words age, crime, crimes with synonyms.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "proportion" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "increase" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "reached" was used 2 times.
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