Developments in science and technology have caused environmental problems.Some people think that a simpler way of lift will protect environment, while others believe that science and technology can solve environmental problems. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.
It is argued that
,
Remove the comma
apply
science
and technological developments contribute in
environmental problems, Change preposition
to
while
some people assume that science
can solve these atmospheric issues. The question arises in our mind, what are the issues and how technology has reduce
these hurdles? I completely agree with the idea and will support my opinion with examples in Change the verb form
reduced
this
essay.
Moving on to the first idea, currently advancement in the field of science
has been noticed, which is the main reason
behind many environmental problems. The first reason
is space experiments
. As every
year scientists send space rockets Correct word choice
Every
to
Change preposition
into
the
space and Correct article usage
apply
some times
they test rockets in the sea, which damages the external life of Correct your spelling
sometimes
sea
and Add an article
the sea
also
impacts the outer atmosphere of the world. Even climate changes are also
caused by these experiments
. The second reason
is advancement in field
of Add an article
the field
medicines
. Scientists risk the lives of animals for their Fix the agreement mistake
medicine
experiments
, even plants are also
used for this
purpose, which results in decay
of species of flora and Add an article
the decay
a decay
fona
. The developed countries are the most prominent figures in Correct your spelling
fauna
font
this
regard. As these
states want to surpass each Correct word choice
These
others
in scientific developments and Change to a singular noun
other
experiments
.
Coming to the second idea, if science
is the reason
behind environmental damages
, Fix the agreement mistake
damage
than
for sure, it is the one that can save world from the destruction. Replace the word
then
Along with
experiments
for new purposes, science
can also
takes
measures to reduce atmospheric hardles. Correct subject-verb agreement
take
Moreover
, researchers should conduct their experiments
in such
a way that are
less harmful Correct subject-verb agreement
is
for
Change the preposition
to
climate
, humans, plants and animals. Correct article usage
the climate
However
, certain initiatives of researchers have contributed in
solving the Change preposition
to
damages
Fix the agreement mistake
damage
of
Change preposition
to
environment
. Correct article usage
the environment
Firstly
artificial rains are not only beneficial for the crops but some times
it is Correct your spelling
sometimes
also
used to lessen the temperature of hot areas. Pakistan is the one, that followes
Correct your spelling
follows
followed
this
strategy in its hotest
cities,like Karachi and Lahore. Correct your spelling
hottest
host
Secondly
, science
predictions of flood
have Fix the agreement mistake
floods
also
helped countries in many ways. For example
, last
year due to
heavy rains flood was expected in the region of Blochistan
, Correct your spelling
Balochistan
due to
early predictions, the government took steps earlier and asked the people of that particular region to leave their homes and move to other places.
Hence
it is proven that science
is the reason
behind many environmental problems and it is the one that can save the world from disaster.Submitted by hadiyanasir73 on
Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.
task response
Your essay demonstrates that you have addressed the task prompt effectively. You have discussed both views and given your opinion, which is great. However, there are places where your arguments could be clearer and more concise. Try to keep your ideas directly related to the task and avoid repetition.
coherence cohesion
Your essay generally follows a logical structure with an introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion. However, there are occasional lapses in clarity which make it harder to follow your argument. Make sure each paragraph has a clear central idea, and use clearer linking phrases to enhance cohesion.
coherence cohesion
You have logically organized your essay with a clear introduction and conclusion which is good for overall coherence.
task response
You have provided relevant examples to support your points, such as the mention of artificial rains in Pakistan and the prediction of floods in Balochistan.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.
Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+
Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!