some people think that having a set retirement age of 65 for everybody, regardless ocupation, is unfair. They believe that certain workers deserve to retaired and receive a pension at an earlier age do you agree or disagree
It is thought by some that having a fixed
age
of retirement
at 65 years old for everyone in relationship with their's
occupations, Change noun form
their
it
is not fair. They think that some kind of Correct pronoun usage
apply
professions
should deserve to retire and obtain a pension at Fix the agreement mistake
profession
sooner
stage. I totally agree with Fix the agreement mistake
a later
this
statement and I will argue the reasons in the ensuing paragraphs.
Firstly
, it is a common belief that not all the
occupations are the same, and some of them Correct article usage
apply
requiere
more physical effort. Correct your spelling
require
Hence
, workers who had
worked Wrong verb form
have
under
situations where their bodies are Change preposition
in
commited
to Correct your spelling
committed
high intensity
Add a hyphen
high-intensity
activities
and where they has
been Change the verb form
have
expoused
themselves to dangerous materials or chemicals, Correct your spelling
exposed
they
deserve an earlier Correct pronoun usage
apply
retirement
and be able to access to
their pensions. Change preposition
apply
For instance
, a person who has been working in construction their entire life,
probably is physically more tired than people who did office work. Remove the comma
apply
Moreover
, I would say that retirement
age
should be clasified
by the kind of Correct your spelling
classified
activities
ejecuted troughtout
life, and not as a fixed Correct your spelling
executed throughout
aged
. Replace the word
age
Becuase
every individual is different and Correct your spelling
Because
do
not have the same Change the verb form
does
requirement
.
Fix the agreement mistake
requirements
Secondly
, retiremnt
Correct your spelling
retirement
age
should be a benefit that any individual could opt to take when they want. For instance
, pension
should work as a Correct article usage
a pension
saving
account that you have access Fix the agreement mistake
savings
whenever
you need, Change preposition
to whenever
in contrast
with the current system impossed
by governments that Correct your spelling
imposed
indicate
a specific Correct subject-verb agreement
indicates
age
for everybody. Moreover
, many activities
are exposures
to Fix the agreement mistake
exposure
hardous
chemicals that lead to cancer and other diseases if you do not retire at an early stage. So it is key to prevent Correct your spelling
hazardous
this
kind of health problems
by implementing new laws to regulate the Fix the agreement mistake
problem
age
of retirement
for those who work in this
areas.
Correct determiner usage
these
To sum up
, I totally agree that some ocupations
require an earlier Correct your spelling
occupations
age
of retirement
, not only because of the physicall
effort but Correct your spelling
physical
also
due to
the time that humans in these activities
are expoused
to hazardous chemicals or dangerous materials.Correct your spelling
exposed
Submitted by jimeilaria on
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Focus on making fewer grammatical errors, especially with the use of tenses and subject-verb agreement.
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