IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4.5

The chart below gives information about the price of tickets on one airline between Sydney and Melbourne, Australia, over a two-week period in 2013. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant. Write at least 150 words.

The chart below gives information about the price of tickets on one airline between Sydney and Melbourne, Australia, over a two-week period in 2013. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant. Write at least 150 words.
#information #price #tickets #airline #sydney #melbourne #australia #period #summarise #features #comparisons
✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
The current graph,shows the value of tickets on
airline
Fix the agreement mistake
airlines
show examples
 between two cities,
hence
 to
this
 graph we can collect all the necessary data.
Overall
,
this
 chart contains information
of
Change preposition
on
show examples
 4 weeks.We
gonna
Wrong verb form
are going to
show examples
 start
discussion
Add an article
a discussion
the discussion
show examples
 with the first
week
Change noun form
week's
show examples
 prices from Sydney to Melbourne the
price
 was at
the
Change the word
its
show examples
 peak on
Change the capitalization
Monday
show examples
monday
Change the capitalization
Monday
show examples
,
Correct your spelling
however
Correct word choice
and howerever
show examples
howerever
Correct your spelling
the
 next 3
days
Change noun form
days'
show examples
 cost remained almost the same,on
friday
Change the capitalization
Friday
show examples
 the cost of the tickets improved significantly and went down till the end of
weekend
Add an article
the weekend
show examples
. The second chart shows the cost
on
Change preposition
for
show examples
 the first week from Melbourne to Sydney,on
monday
Change the capitalization
Monday
show examples
 the
price
 remained in the range
betweeen
Correct your spelling
between
 50-60 dollars but it's in the next 3 days the
price
has
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
dropped dramatically,
besides
 that the
price
 on
friday
Change the capitalization
Friday
show examples
had
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
a huge improvements
Correct the article-noun agreement
a huge improvement
huge improvements
show examples
 in value getting up to 80 dollars per ticket and that the
price
it's slightly went
Change the verb form
it's slightly going
it's slightly gone
show examples
 down. To summarize,looking at
this
 chart we can see that
everyday
Replace the word
every day
show examples
 of
a
Correct article usage
the
show examples
 week
price
Correct article usage
the price
show examples
 fluctuated and wasn't stable.
Submitted by ayhanhuseynov13 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
▼
Introduction: The introduction is missing.
▼
Introduction: Change the first sentence in the introduction.
▼
Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
▼
Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
▼
Vocabulary: Replace the words price with synonyms.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "chart" was used 3 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "went down" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "remained" was used 2 times.
▼
What to do next:
Look at other essays: