Some people think the manufacturers and shopping malls should sell fewer packaged products while the others argue that people have the responsibility to buy products with less packaging. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.
Environmental damage is a pressing issue today. It is worth noting that
although
the question is multifaceted, contamination with the
plastic wastes occupies a significant part in Correct article usage
apply
this
regard. For that reason, people have divided into two groups: the majority declare
the production and selling of plastic bags just Change the verb form
declares
as well as
packaged products must be reduced to an absolute minimum, whereas
the minority shift the responsibility to the ordinary consumers, calling them for acquiring less those packed merchandises
. In Fix the agreement mistake
merchandise
this
essay, the
both viewpoints will be represented.
At Remove the article
apply
first,
it is highly reasonable to notice that in an epoch of the green agenda, reducing production
of polymers and their trade turnover Add an article
the production
are
indeed a wise step to cope with the total environmental damage. Governments should encourage the manufacturers, being the first link in the chain, to produce nature-friendly goods. Because, casual buyers, primordially, tend to think of convenience and accessibility; they are simply not preoccupied with Correct subject-verb agreement
is
the
recycling and things like that.
Consumers, Correct article usage
apply
however
, just as the
all individuals on Remove the article
apply
this
planet should take into account the fact that the rate of the
total contamination is accelerating over time. Most people usually take for granted the wealth of nature. After all, it is utterly understood that everything is interconnected in the world. Correct article usage
apply
Therefore
, if everyone on the Earth had thought of every
not recycled discarded packaging, we would have never faced the problem. Correct determiner usage
apply
Thus
, one of the excellent decisions is probably so-called propaganda to convey the
total population the whole idea.
In conclusion, the dilemma is complicated. The approach to the trade turnover of polymers should be versatile. The main argument against the green agenda is always funding and other financial aspects. It is followed Change preposition
to the
for
scientists and environmentalists to work for cheaper and eco-friendly alternatives for polymers.Change preposition
by
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task achievement
You've engaged well with the topic and presented an understanding of both viewpoints. However, your essay would benefit from clearer articulation of your own opinion and specific examples to support your ideas. Consider not only stating the perspectives but also illustrating them with examples or statistics.
coherence cohesion
While your essay is logically structured and follows a clear progression, there are parts where it feels slightly disjointed. Work on smooth transitions between points and ensure each paragraph focuses on one main idea. Also, try to make your conclusion more robust by summarizing your key points effectively and reinforcing your own stance.
coherence cohesion
Your essay has a nice flow, but polishing the language and ensuring grammatical accuracy will enhance the readability. Some sentences are complex and might benefit from simplification for better clarity. Additionally, rephrasing certain parts to avoid repetition would be helpful.
task achievement
You've provided a balanced discussion that addresses both viewpoints, which is important for a well-rounded essay.
coherence cohesion
The introduction successfully contextualizes the issue and sets up the discussion effectively.
task achievement
Your essay reflects a good understanding of the topic and thoughtful engagement with the issue.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.