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Writing Samples
Band 5

Nowadays, people make new friends with the use of social networks and internet chat groups. Some of the people think this is good. other people thinks that face-to-face conversations is beneficial. discuss both sides.

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People
Use synonyms
 nowadays are using social media and group chats to meet new
people
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.
While
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 some majority believe that
this
Linking Words
 is good, others argue that having
conversation
Add an article
a conversation
show examples
 directly gives more benefit.
This
Linking Words
 essay discusses both views and I suppose that finding new
friends
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 on the
internet
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 is not less beneficial than having face-to-face
interaction
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. Many
people
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 get to know each other and become
friends
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 because of chat groups
in
Change preposition
on
show examples
the
Correct article usage
apply
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social networks. On the
internet
Use synonyms
, we can easily find communities where
people
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 share the same hobbies or interests, regardless of
the
Correct article usage
apply
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age, culture or nationality.
For instance
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, a lot of fans of a particular celebrity from all over the world met through social media chat groups, mainly from Twitter, and became
internet
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friends
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.
Therefore
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, the
internet
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 is very helpful as it provides
large
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a large
the large
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 number of communities to share
informations
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information
pieces of information
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 about a specific topic or interest. Direct
interaction
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 offers a different kind of benefit from online
interaction
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. As a human being, we can not live without talking to other
people
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.
Moreover
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, speaking directly
also
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help
Correct subject-verb agreement
helps
show examples
 the brain to operate and construct sentences, so we would not lose the ability to have basic social
skill
Fix the agreement mistake
skills
show examples
.
However
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, compared to online social platforms, it is harder to find like-minded
people
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 because we have to figure it out by ourselves whether they have similar interests or not. In the end, we search for them
from
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on
show examples
 the
internet
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 and arrange
meeting
Fix the agreement mistake
meetings
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 with them to have face-to-face
interaction
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. In conclusion,
while
Linking Words
 some
people
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 prefer direct
interaction
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 with others, social media group chats offer
better
Add an article
a better
show examples
 solution for
people
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 to make new
friends
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 through similarities and I choose the latter view.

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task response
Expand on your points with more specific examples or evidence to strengthen your arguments. For example, you can elaborate more on how online friendships can translate into real-world benefits.
coherence cohesion
Work on ensuring that your ideas flow smoothly from one to the next. Using transitional phrases can help to guide the reader and improve the overall coherence of your essay.
coherence cohesion
Double-check your grammar and word choice to ensure clarity, and be mindful of minor errors that can affect the readability of your essay.
task response
You have clearly addressed both sides of the argument, providing a balanced discussion which is essential for a well-rounded essay.
coherence cohesion
Your introduction and conclusion are well-structured, effectively presenting your viewpoint and summarizing your arguments.
task response
You have included relevant examples that help to illustrate your points, demonstrating a good understanding of the topic.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • Accessibility
  • Convenience
  • Anonymity
  • Socially anxious
  • Introverts
  • Diverse cultures
  • Perspectives
  • Non-verbal cues
  • Body language
  • Facial expressions
  • Emotional bonds
  • Trust
  • Meaningful interactions
  • Sustained conversations
  • Distractions
  • Social skills
  • Effective communication
  • Empathy
  • Active listening
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