IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5

The chart below gives information on the percentage of British people giving money to charity by age range for the years 1990 and 2010. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant.

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The bar chart illustrates the amount of money that people in the UK
donating
Wrong verb form
donated
show examples
 to charity by different
age
Use synonyms
range
Correct subject-verb agreement
ranges
show examples
 in
Change the article
the year
show examples
year
Fix the agreement mistake
years
show examples
 1990 and 2010.The data is presented in percentages.
Overall
Linking Words
,it can be seen that the majority of donations came from people
in
Change preposition
of
show examples
 working
age
Use synonyms
 and the minority came from teenagers. In 1990,The proportion of money
giving
Wrong verb form
given
show examples
 to charity increased steadily from
age
Use synonyms
 18-50 until reached
the
Change the word
its
show examples
 peak at
age
Use synonyms
 36-50 which was around 42%.After
that
Add a comma
that,
show examples
 the percentage dropped to 35% at
age
Use synonyms
 51-65 and decreased to just above 30%
at
Change preposition
in
show examples
Use synonyms
age
Correct article usage
the age
show examples
 group >65. In 2010,The percentage of money followed the same pattern as
year
Change the article
the year
show examples
 1990,which
was
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
increased continuously from
age
Use synonyms
 18 until peaking at
age
Use synonyms
 51-65 occupying 41%.
Linking Words
Lastly
Add a comma
Lastly,
show examples
 the proportion
in
Change preposition
of
show examples
 people at
age
Use synonyms
 >65 slightly dropped to 35%.

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Common mistake: Your writing should be 150-250 words.
Basic structure: Change the second paragraph.
▼
Vocabulary: Replace the words age with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: The word "percentages" was used 3 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "proportion" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "increased" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the second paragraph.
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Topic Vocabulary:
  • charitable donations
  • age range/bracket/group
  • percentage (%)
  • 20-year period
  • British people
  • trends
  • increase/decrease
  • significant change
  • donation patterns
  • remained stable
  • highest/lowest
  • observe
  • compare
  • summarize
  • comment on
  • relevant features
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