The bar charts bellow show the percentages of men and women in employment in three countries in 2005 and 2015.

The bar charts bellow show the percentages of men and women in employment in three countries in 2005 and 2015.
The bar charts compare the percentages of
men
and
women
in
employment
in
Canada
, South
Korea
and Sweden between 2005 and 2015.
It is clear that
the highest
employment
rate
was in Sweden
overall
,
while
the lowest
employment
rate
was in
Canada
.
Overall
, males had the highest
employment
rate
,
while
females had the lowest.
Employment
rates
were about the same across countries and
gender
Fix the agreement mistake
genders
show examples
both
Change preposition
in both
show examples
years
. Sweden had the highest
employment
rate
among
men
and
women
overall
; more than 70% of Swedish
men
were employed and more than 45% of Swedish
women
were employed
both
years
.
By contrast
,
Canada
had lower
employment
rates
; in 2005, 35% of
women
and 61% of
men
were employed. In 2015, 55% of
women
and 75% of
men
were employed. South
Korea
,
on the other hand
, had high
employment
rates
for
men
, about 75% in
both
years
, and low
employment
rates
for
women
, about 30-35% in
both
years
. In every country in 2005 and 2015,
men
had higher percentages of
employment
than
women
, sometimes more than a 42% difference, which was seen in South
Korea
in 2005. The percentages were closer in
Canada
in 2015, where 55% of
women
worked and 70% of
men
(only a 15% difference). The percentage of working
women
across all countries was slightly higher in 2015 than in 2005, from 32% of working
women
in South
Korea
to 52% of working
women
in
Canada
.
Submitted by jessica.pastor.87 on

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "overall, while".
Vocabulary: Replace the words men, women, employment, canada, korea, rate, rates, both, years with synonyms.
Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "percentages" in your introduction.
Vocabulary: Only 6 basic words for charts were used.
Vocabulary: The word "difference" was used 2 times.
Vocabulary: The word "percentages" was used 4 times.
Vocabulary: The word "about" was used 3 times.

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