The bar charts bellow show the percentages of men and women in employment in three countries in 2005 and 2015.
The bar charts compare the percentages of
men
and women
in employment
in Canada
, South Korea
and Sweden between 2005 and 2015.
It is clear that
the highest employment
rate
was in Sweden overall
, while
the lowest employment
rate
was in Canada
. Overall
, males had the highest employment
rate
, while
females had the lowest. Employment
rates
were about the same across countries and gender
Fix the agreement mistake
genders
both
Change preposition
in both
years
.
Sweden had the highest employment
rate
among men
and women
overall
; more than 70% of Swedish men
were employed and more than 45% of Swedish women
were employed both
years
. By contrast
, Canada
had lower employment
rates
; in 2005, 35% of women
and 61% of men
were employed. In 2015, 55% of women
and 75% of men
were employed. South Korea
, on the other hand
, had high employment
rates
for men
, about 75% in both
years
, and low employment
rates
for women
, about 30-35% in both
years
.
In every country in 2005 and 2015, men
had higher percentages of employment
than women
, sometimes more than a 42% difference, which was seen in South Korea
in 2005. The percentages were closer in Canada
in 2015, where 55% of women
worked and 70% of men
(only a 15% difference). The percentage of working women
across all countries was slightly higher in 2015 than in 2005, from 32% of working women
in South Korea
to 52% of working women
in Canada
.Submitted by jessica.pastor.87 on
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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "overall, while".
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Vocabulary: Replace the words men, women, employment, canada, korea, rate, rates, both, years with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "percentages" in your introduction.
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Vocabulary: Only 6 basic words for charts were used.
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Vocabulary: The word "difference" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "percentages" was used 4 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "about" was used 3 times.
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