The maps below show the center of a small town called Islip as it is now, and the plans for its development. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The maps below show the center of a small town called Islip as it is now, and the plans for its development.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
The maps
shows
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show
show examples
information about how the
center
Change the spelling
centre
show examples
of small towns
lslip
Correct your spelling
slip
between in the present
in addition
in the future when
the
Correct your spelling
they
show examples
change the destination of the centre.
Overall
,
as
Correct word choice
apply
show examples
it is clear that
there is a huge change between
lslips
Correct your spelling
slips
town centre now and planned development
moreover
the most significant in planned development was added a lot of buildings
Add the comma(s)
, in contrast,
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in contrast
the
lslips
Correct your spelling
slips
lips
town now there was a little
bulided
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bullied
blinded
builder
.
Gerenally
Correct your spelling
Generally
speaking, the map now there is
main
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the main
show examples
read
Correct your spelling
road
show examples
while
when the second plane will removing to making different road. In the north in the
development
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development,
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area will be four locations
that
Correct pronoun usage
apply
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namely new housing in the northeast and in the opposite bus station
moreover
in the middle will be
shopping
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a shopping
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centre
it
Correct pronoun usage
apply
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next to
car
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the car
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park . On the other side in the
south
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south,
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the housing will be converted to new housing
while
the school
it was
Verb problem
is in
show examples
the same place .
Likewise
the shops
it
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
will not
changing
Change the verb form
change
be changing
show examples
.
Submitted by sialamer on

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "moreover, while".
Basic structure: Change the fourth paragraph.
Basic structure: Change the fifth paragraph.
Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "information" in your introduction.
Vocabulary: The word "maps" was used 2 times.
Vocabulary: The word "change" was used 2 times.
Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the fourth paragraph.
Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the fifth paragraph.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • dual carriageway
  • pedestrian-only street
  • reroute
  • infrastructure
  • development plan
  • proposed
  • augmentation
  • north side/south side
  • housing/residential area
  • accessibility
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