In the past, most working people had only one job. However, nowadays, more and more people have more than one job at the same time. What are the reasons for this development? What are the advantages and disadvantages of having more than one job?

In contemporary society,
although
the vast majority of individuals were employed in a single location a few decades ago rather than engaged to multiple employees at the same time in modern days.
This
situation raised a significant amount of trend in most countries,
due to
fluctuation of daily essential rates
as well as
unstable global economy are main justifications to
this
matter.
This
essay will shed some light on
to emphasise
Change the verb form
emphasising
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a variety of factors
as well as
maintain
Wrong verb form
maintaining
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the pros and cons experienced
due to
this
statement. On the one hand,
this
topic made a huge impact on society by describing the main points
further
in
this
section. There are a few factors that create an intense to daily consumable products that fluctuate rates that depend on the global market since the basic wages remain the same rather than increase against the rates.
For instance
, these issues frequently disturbances of normal environmental factors
such
as the pandemic COVID situation raising a dramatic effect and severe debates with neighbouring countries which result in war situations in the recent 21st century.
On the other hand
, in terms of positive effects of
this
statement could be vividly visible like enhancing multi-talented person by gaining a variety of work environments, rather than working under the same company.
In Addition
,
this
creates a transformation of time management of a single person, with regards to working on various jobs that directly influence individuals firmly manage their time schedule. When it comes to
negative
Correct article usage
the negative
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effects of a person's lifestyle by soaring considerably high stress.
Further
, social and self-spending will loss of being worked in multiple jobs rather than
remaining
Verb problem
apply
show examples
enjoying personal satisfaction. In conclusion, enrolling on various places to earn and spend individuals' lives would be essential in their lifetime.
Hence
, generating multiple positive and negative consequences could result in a variety of ways in personal life.
Submitted by keranda.sac on

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Task Response
Try to refine your introduction for clarity. Clearly state the specific reasons why people are having more than one job and outline the advantages and disadvantages clearly.
Coherence and Cohesion
Consider using clearer topic sentences to explicitly outline the main idea of each paragraph. This will help the reader follow your argument more effectively.
Task Response
Your main points could use more specific examples and data to better support your arguments.
Coherence and Cohesion
Your essay opens and closes with an introduction and conclusion, which is essential to providing a logical structure.
Task Response
You addressed the two-part question and mentioned both reasons for the trend and its advantages and disadvantages.
Coherence and Cohesion
You attempted to acknowledge different perspectives and provide balanced insights into the issue.

Your opinion

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Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

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...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • Economic stability
  • Multiple income streams
  • Gig economy
  • Freelance work
  • Contract work
  • Professional development
  • Financial security
  • Job market
  • Diversified income
  • Burnout
  • Skill set
  • Networking opportunities
  • Work-life balance
  • Mental well-being
  • Time management
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