Nowadays many people have access to computers on a wide basis and a large number of children play computer games. What are the positive and negative impacts of playing computer games and what can be done to minimize the bad effects? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own experience or knowledge. You should write at least 250 words.

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In recent years, majority of the people have access to computers and
Internet
Correct article usage
the Internet
show examples
which have made people's
life
Fix the agreement mistake
lives
show examples
much easier compared to earlier times.
However
, it has been observed that a lot of
children
nowadays spend a large amount of their time
i
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
playing
computer
games
. There are a number of negative impacts which have been identified
due to
this
trend.
Firstly
, in
this
day and age, a lot of kids are visually impaired
due to
the long screen
hours
they spend with
computer
games
.
For example
, my cousin had to wear powered spectacles at a younger age
due to
the long
hours
she spent on
computer
games
. Playing
games
helps you to be engaged and some
games
help with brain development.
However
, it is important for parents or elders to maintain some restrictions on the number of
hours
kids spend on the
Internet
and
computer
games
.
Secondly
,
Children
tend to be less social compared to older time over the years. Since they find
computer
games
more interesting, they stay indoors and indulge themselves
into
Change preposition
in
show examples
it
Correct pronoun usage
them
show examples
. They are less involved in outdoor activities and
also
not interacting with the outside world. These actions can make them less social.
Furthermore
,
this
may lead to health issues
due to
unhealthy food habits and may cause stress issues or anxiety problems in
children
. Parents and educational systems should encourage
children
to participate in outdoor activities
such
as sports events or swimming and they should be rewarded in some ways.
This
method can help the kids to be motivated and
also
stay away from
computer
games
.
To conclude
, parents should maintain restricted
hours
for accessing the
internet
and
computer
games
also
they should motivate and encourage the
children
to participate in outdoor activities and meet-ups. These practices can reduce the negative effects which the
internet
and
computer
games
bring to
children
.
Submitted by greeshmav91 on

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task achievement
The essay responds well to the task, addressing both positive and negative impacts of computer games and suggesting ways to mitigate negative effects. Expanding on how some games contribute to brain development could enhance the task response.
coherence cohesion
The essay generally flows well; however, using more transitional words or phrases could improve the logical progression of ideas and arguments.
coherence cohesion
The introduction clearly sets the context and outlines the main points that will be discussed in the essay, which helps in framing a focused discussion.
coherence cohesion
The conclusion effectively summarizes the main points and restates the overall argument, reinforcing the essay's message.
task achievement
The use of a personal example adds weight to your argument and demonstrates how excessive screen time can be detrimental to a child's vision.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • addiction
  • sedentary lifestyle
  • obesity
  • eye strain
  • inappropriate content
  • social skills
  • isolation
  • academic performance
  • time limits
  • parental supervision
  • age-appropriate
  • physical activities
  • digital literacy
  • balanced computer usage
  • excessive gaming
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