Some species of animals are almost extinct; and many others seem to be fast approaching a similar risk. What are the reasons for this? What should be done to solve this problem?
It is true that some species of
animals
are endagered
nowadays. Human Correct your spelling
endangered
activities
is
considered the main reason why Change the verb form
are
this
is the case, and governments and residents should be responsible for solving this
problem.
The biggest factor leading to this
problem is that human activities
impact to extinction of many species of animals
because of poaching for consumption or fashion
industry. Correct article usage
the fashion
Moreover
, maximizing buildings and infrastuctures
can encroach Correct your spelling
infrastructures
infrastructure
animal
habitats. Change preposition
on animal
For example
, according to
the latest research conducted by Bangkok University, Thailand, it was reavealed
that 60% of fashion industries in Thailand utilize Correct your spelling
revealed
animal's
skin Change noun form
animal
for
produce lether Change preposition
to
procucts
Correct your spelling
products
such
as bags, shoes and clothes. This
example shows that human activities
play a major role in animal extinction.
In order to solve this
issue, governments and residents should take action as soon as possible. The most significant solution to support this
the
fact that governments should introduce laws to preserve natural areas and wild Add a missing verb
is the
animals
. The citizens also
should participate in campaign
willingly. Correct article usage
the campaign
Thus
, animals
should have thier
own Correct your spelling
their
sacrified
lives, and it can affect to Correct your spelling
sacrificed
maintain
Replace the word
maintenance
biodiversity
and ecology balance. If Change preposition
of biodiversity
animals
will be
not protected as soon as possible, they will die out obviously. To illustrate Wrong verb form
are
this
, in recent news, it has been reported that there is abundant wildlife in Costa Rica because the government has impulsive regulations for preventing hunting wild
Change preposition
of wild
animals
.
In conclusion, some species of animals
are almost extinct because of human activities
. In order to combat this
, govenments
and citizens should be responsible for solving Correct your spelling
governments
this
problem together.Submitted by chachiiaom on
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task achievement
To improve task achievement, expand on ideas and examples to ensure a more detailed exploration of the topic.
coherence cohesion
Work on providing more elaboration on specific points to strengthen coherence and cohesion in your arguments.
introduction conclusion
Your essay effectively introduces the topic and includes a clear conclusion.
supported main points
You provide relevant examples to support your points, especially the example from the fashion industry in Thailand.