IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6.5

The graphs show the changes in the UK industry steel between 1970 and 2000. (million tonnes vs thousand). Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant. Value changes in UK steel industry 1970-2000. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant.

The graphs show the changes in the UK industry steel between 1970 and 2000. (million tonnes vs thousand). Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant. Value changes in UK steel industry 1970-2000. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant.
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The provided graphs illustrate the alterations in the valuation and the employment figures of
Use synonyms
steel
Add an article
the steel
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 industry in the UK during the period of 1970 to 2000.
Overall
Linking Words
, it can be seen that the UK has witnessed a significant downturn trend in aggregate demand,
manufacture
Wrong verb form
manufacturing
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, and the number of employment.
In addition
Linking Words
, the gradually upward trend was only observed for
steel
Use synonyms
import
Fix the agreement mistake
imports
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. To be more specific,
at
Change the preposition
in
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 the beginning, the entire demand for
steel
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 in the UK was 200000
tonnes
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,
meanwhile
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meanwhile,
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 there were about 153000
tonnes
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 of
steel
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 manufactured in
this
Linking Words
 year. The figures for
steel
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import
Fix the agreement mistake
imports
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 nearly reached zero
tonnes
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in1970
Correct your spelling
in 1970
. Over the next 30 years, the total demand and
steel
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 production alleviated twofold, finishing at 100000
tonnes
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 and approximately 80000
tonnes
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, respectively.
Conversely
Linking Words
,
steel
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 importing witnessed a jump to about 70000
tonnes
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at the end
Linking Words
 of the period. A closer look at the second chart reveals, in 1970, there were 50000 people working in the
steel
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 sector, but
this
Linking Words
 figure
proned
Correct your spelling
prone
proved
 to
decreased
Wrong verb form
decrease
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 as the years passed by, with a sharp decline from 40000 in 1980 to around 20000 thousand in 1990,
finally
Linking Words
, roughly 18000 employees worked in
Use synonyms
steel
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the steel
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 industry in 200.

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Vocabulary: Replace the words steel, tonnes with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: The word "figures" was used 3 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "figures" was used 3 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "trend" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "about" was used 2 times.
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