IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 2.5

People believe that chat you organisations should offer help to the people of their own country. But others believe that those organisation should give aid to the people in great need wherever they live . Both views and give your opinion.

#people #chat #organisations #offer #country #organisation #aid
The pic charts provide key information about the
coffee
 producers, consumption and the profit distribution across all the world. The units are measured in percentages.
Overall
, it is clear from the graph that profit distribution especially in delivery has a significant rate among
another segments
Replace the adjective
another segment
other segments
show examples
.
In addition
,
move
Wrong verb form
moving
show examples
 to
making
Change the verb form
make
show examples
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
coffee
,
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
South Africa has a considerable amount at 44%,
whereas
 Japan contains
a
Correct article usage
the
show examples
 tiniest proportion roughly 18%.
According to
 what is shown, we notice the creation the
coffee
 ,in Indonesia has
moderate
Add an article
a moderate
show examples
 number
by
Change preposition
of
show examples
 22% , compared to Vietnam having
smallest
Correct article usage
the smallest
show examples
 proportion
by
Change preposition
of
show examples
 16%. In terms of consumption, America
is
Verb problem
apply
show examples
significantly
consumed
Wrong verb form
consumes
show examples
 the most of caffeine at 39%.
In contrast
,
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
Japan is
expend
Verb problem
spending
show examples
 less
of
Change preposition
on
show examples
coffee
 by 8% and the rest of the world
has consumed
Wrong verb form
consumes
show examples
 more
coffee
 by 12%,
however
, Europe
demonstrate
Change the verb form
demonstrates
show examples
 a higher
ration
Correct your spelling
ratio
show examples
 among other regions around 41% ,
thus
 we reckon
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
Europe has more consumption than other
contries
Correct your spelling
countries
.
Submitted by raghadyaseer2015 on

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introduction conclusion present
Ensure the essay has a clear introduction presenting the topic and a conclusion summarizing key points.
logical structure
Improve coherence by organizing the essay with a logical structure, ensuring each paragraph transitions smoothly to the next.
clear comprehensive ideas
Develop ideas more clearly; it can be helpful to detail the significance of the data presented in the charts.
complete response
The essay provides a general overview of the data presented in the pie charts, touching upon key figures and percentages.
relevant specific examples
Relevant data from the chart is used, giving specific percentages to support statements about production and consumption.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • Charity organizations
  • Cultural familiarity
  • Resource allocation
  • Local issues
  • Fairness
  • Global need
  • Greater impact
  • Global citizenship
  • Interconnected
  • Underserved
  • Solidarity
  • Cooperation
  • Populace
  • Transcend national boundaries
What to do next:
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