Working abroad can help employees earn a great deal of money and gain more benifits however, some people think this trend has many nagative impacts. Discuss the advantages and disadvantages of working abroad.

Many people argue that travelling abroad for work has many benefits in different ways in terms of money and other things,
while
others argue that
this
phenomenon has negative outcomes.
This
essay will discuss both views. Working abroad can open many doors for you.
Firstly
, it offers better opportunities for employees to earn more money.
For example
, when the company my dad works for asks him to travel to a country in order to work for some time, he earns extra credit which increases his income.
Secondly
, it allows him to meet people from different cultures, which helps
expanding
Wrong verb form
expand
show examples
his horizons,
moreover
,
making
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make
show examples
connections that may help in future.
However
, there are some disadvantages as well. Going abroad for work separates you from your family and loved ones,
as a result
, you might feel lonely and
no
Add a missing verb
have no
show examples
one by your side.
Furthermore
, when going to a new country it might be difficult to adapt to the atmosphere, culture, language and the locals, which can make you feel left out and out of place. But,
this
isn't a huge issue for everyone. In conclusion,
Although
you may face some problems
to adapt
Change the verb form
adapting
show examples
and
get
Wrong verb form
getting
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used to things. I think
this
opportunity to get employed in a different country is unique and a once in a
life time
Correct your spelling
lifetime
show examples
chance that will teach you new things and will create beautiful memories to look back at .
Submitted by shadaataria1 on

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task response
Your essay provides a clear introduction and conclusion, which is great for setting up and wrapping up your argument. To make your essay even stronger, try to develop each point more fully, providing additional examples and explanations. This will demonstrate a more thorough exploration of the topic.
coherence cohesion
While your essay has a logical structure, linking words such as 'moreover', 'furthermore', and 'for example' could be used more effectively to enhance the cohesion between different parts. Consider also organizing the discussion of advantages and disadvantages into separate paragraphs for clarity.
task response
You have accurately introduced the topic and presented both advantages and disadvantages of working abroad.
task response
Your essay uses personal examples, which make your points more relatable. This is a good strategy for supporting your opinions.
coherence cohesion
The structure of your essay is clear, with a logical progression from introduction to body to conclusion.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example

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