Some people feel that teacher training course can make anyone a teacher, while other feels an excellent teacher cannot be produced by pursuing a course. Discuss both views and give opinion.

Prevention
helps to maintain
a
Remove the article
apply
show examples
good public
health
. If the government take measures to improve public
health
,
they
Correct pronoun usage
it
show examples
will initiate several campaigns regarding
prevention
Correct article usage
the prevention
show examples
of diseases and the public will be more conscious of their
health
. The public will encouraged to maintain a healthy lifestyle and maintain
a
Remove the article
apply
show examples
good
health
.
Moreover
, another reason for the importance of
prevention
is research and treatment of diseases are costly.
Therefore
, if the government invest money in
prevention
Correct article usage
the prevention
show examples
of diseases, that will be more useful for the general public.
Submitted by rahman_rehana on

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coherence cohesion
Consider adding a clear introduction that presents the topic and outlines the main points that will be discussed. This will help provide a strong foundation for your essay.
coherence cohesion
It would be helpful to include a conclusion that summarizes the main points and reinforces the key arguments made in the essay.
task achievement
You could improve the task response by directly addressing both views on whether prevention is prioritized over treatment and research. Discuss any potential drawbacks or counterarguments about focusing solely on prevention.
task achievement
Including more varied examples would strengthen your arguments. Consider citing specific campaigns or statistics that illustrate the effectiveness of preventive measures.
task achievement
You have identified prevention as a cost-effective approach for maintaining public health, which is a solid point backed by logical reasoning.
coherence cohesion
The essay maintains a reasonable level of coherence, with ideas that are generally well-linked and follow a logical sequence.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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