Some people believe that people today have no interest in maintaining the traditional culture of their country or region. Why might this be the case? Is this a positive or negative trend?

Globalization made some changes to the world and in
this
way, many cultures and traditions
also
got
Verb problem
been
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affected. One of the biggest changes that we can point out is making
youngers
Correct your spelling
youngsters
show examples
forget some old beliefs they had.
this
essay explores the reasons for
this
trend and whether it is positive or not. To start with, there are already many old cultures left behind because of globalisation.
Also
, the hosts seem to show no resistance to it as if they want it to happen too.
Firstly
, one of the most important reasons that might come to
anyone
Change noun form
anyone's
show examples
mind, is that those types of society tend to feel the fading tradition is outdated and not well understood by today's world. In detail,
this
actually makes sense and as we can see some groups are not welcome in society unless they put away the behaviour which is causing the problem.
Secondly
, these days hectic lives would make it more difficult to stick with old hobbies as humans are busy working all day long to make some money.
Moreover
,
this
trend could be both positive and negative depending on different cases.
For example
, in the past, the idea that girls do not matter at all
,
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apply
show examples
was a common thing in many countries. In fact, in some
countries
Add a comma
countries,
show examples
girls were seen as shameful and every parent would either kill the poor child or raise her like a slave.
Although
, negative effects are present in
this
trend like many vibrant traditions from Mexico or
asian
Change the capitalization
Asian
show examples
ones, that are now dying out mostly
due to
Western influence. In conclusion, youth might not have that much free time to keep alive their beliefs as they
got
Verb problem
have
show examples
to find a way to survive today's hectic pace of life.
Overall
, it could be bad or not, which is all followed by
this
question's answer "Is the belief a worthy one?".
Submitted by Taha Sol. on

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task achievement
Work on providing more specific and detailed examples that directly support your main points.
task achievement
Ensure that your ideas are fully developed and not just mentioned briefly. This will help in expressing your thoughts more clearly and comprehensively.
coherence cohesion
Try to reinforce the connection between ideas to improve the overall logical flow of your essay. Use linking words and phrases appropriately to achieve this.
coherence cohesion
The essay has a clear introduction and conclusion which frame your discussion well.
task achievement
The essay addresses the task by discussing both reasons why people might not maintain traditional culture and the implications of this trend.
task achievement
Relevant examples, such as the value of girls in a society, are used to illustrate points, providing a personal touch to the discussion.

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Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • Globalization
  • Western influence
  • Homogenous culture
  • Pop culture
  • Social media
  • Traditional customs
  • Urbanization
  • Rural areas
  • Cultural disconnect
  • Impractical
  • Career advancement
  • Globally relevant skills
  • Traditional knowledge
  • Modernization
  • Cultural preservation
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