IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6.5

The bar chart below shows the sector contributions to India’s gross domestic product from 1960 to 2000. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The bar chart below shows the sector contributions to India’s gross domestic product from 1960 to 2000. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
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The bar chart illustrates the
contribution
Use synonyms
 of three sectors:
agriculture
Use synonyms
, industry, and
services
Use synonyms
 to India’s GDP from 1960 to 1990.
Overall
Linking Words
, in the
last
Linking Words
 three
decades
Add a comma
decades,
show examples
 India’s
GDP
Change noun form
GDP's
show examples
 main
contribution
Use synonyms
 was from
agriculture
Use synonyms
 ,
whereas
Linking Words
 in the
last
Linking Words
 ten
years
Add a comma
years,
show examples
 the main
contribution
Use synonyms
 was
services
Use synonyms
.
Agriculture
Use synonyms
 went down over the period given ,
while
Linking Words
 industry and
services
Use synonyms
 increased over
fourty
Correct your spelling
forty
 years. The percentage of
agriculture
Use synonyms
 was already at its peak
in
Change the preposition
at
show examples
 the beginning of the period at about 61%.
This
Linking Words
 figure
then
Linking Words
 began to drop slightly during the period given until it reached its lowest at approximately 12% in 2000 .
On the other hand
Linking Words
,
services
Use synonyms
 just started at almost 14% in 1960, after which the proportion started rising gradually for four decades until it reached its highest point at over 60% in the final year and it was the highest sector
contribution
Use synonyms
 among them in 2000. In terms of industry, it accounted for 13% in 1960 ,
then
Linking Words
 it went up to approximately 23%
1980
Change preposition
in 1980
show examples
 and it
also
Linking Words
 remained the same in 1980 before falling dramatically to nearly 12% in 2000.

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "last".
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Vocabulary: Replace the words contribution, agriculture, services with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: The word "give" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "went down" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "reached" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "approximately" was used 2 times.
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