One problem faced by almost every large city is traffic congestion. What do you think the causes are? What solutions can you suggest?

#city #traffic #congestion

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One of the major problems faced by many urban areas is

traffic

Use synonyms

jams.

This

Linking Words

is mainly because many

people

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use their private

cars

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instead

Linking Words

of public transport in the rush hour. To tackle

this

Linking Words

problem, governments should promote public

transportations

Fix the agreement mistake

transportation

show examples

and they can cooperate with employers to have flexible working

hours

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for their employees. The number of

people

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who

having

Change the form of the verb

have

show examples

private

cars

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increase

Wrong verb form

is increasing

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significantly year by year and

this

Linking Words

phenomenon

make

Correct subject-verb agreement

makes

show examples

public

transports

Fix the agreement mistake

transport

show examples

Unnecessary verb

apply

show examples

not quite popular. They feel more comfortable using their private

cars

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than public

transports

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transport

show examples

because of the flexibility of it.

Additionally

Linking Words

people

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travel to work and go back

Change preposition

apply

show examples

home at the same time on the weekdays.

For example

Linking Words

, in Jakarta,

Correct article usage

the

show examples

capital city of Indonesia, they are

going

Wrong verb form

show examples

to work usually at 8.30 am and drive

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apply

show examples

home at 5.30 pm which

worsening

Wrong verb form

worsens

show examples

the

traffic

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congestion

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show examples

the roads.

Eventhough

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Even though

there are many available options of trains, buses, and metro, many

people

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prefer to use their own

cars

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in the rush

hours

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. To solve

this

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problem, in my opinion,

thera

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there

are two viable solutions.

Firstly

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, the governments should promote public transport by increasing the quality and the quantity of the services.

Moreover

Linking Words

, beyond the services, the governments should make sure public

transportations

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transportation

show examples

is cheaper than private

cars

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Secondly

Linking Words

policy makers

Correct your spelling

policymakers

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can coordinate with employers to arrange flexible working

hours

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or hybrid working

scheme

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schemes

show examples

. Despite preventing the

traffic

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jams, these solutions will reduce

stress

Add an article

the stress

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of the

people

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who live in

metropolis

Correct article usage

the metropolis

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area. In

conlusion

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conclusion

, plenty numbers of private

cars

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on the roads will consequence

Change preposition

show examples

traffic

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jams. The viable solutions to prevent

this

Linking Words

issues

Fix the agreement mistake

issue

show examples

are to encourage

people

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to use public

transports

Fix the agreement mistake

transport

show examples

and

availability

Correct article usage

the availability

show examples

of flexible working

hours

Use synonyms

Submitted by ru.kabiru.biru on Fri Oct 18 2024

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coherence cohesion

To enhance coherence, consider adding linking words or phrases between paragraphs, such as 'Furthermore,' or 'On the other hand,' to make the transition smoother.

task achievement

In the paragraph about causes, provide more statistical data or survey results to reinforce the arguments made about why people prefer private cars.

introduction conclusion present

The essay provides a clear introduction and conclusion, effectively framing the discussion about traffic congestion in urban areas.

relevant specific examples

You offer specific examples, like the case of Jakarta, to illustrate points, making the essay more relatable and grounded in reality.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

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7
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
4
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
25
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 7.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

282 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

traffic congestion
urban population
public transportation
urban planning
infrastructure
economic strength
consumerism
car ownership
commuting
peak hours
public transit
carpooling
ride-sharing
remote work
flexible working hours
cycling infrastructure
congestion charges
traffic management systems

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One problem faced by almost every large city is traffic congestion. What do you think the causes are? What solutions can you suggest?

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Nowadays longer distances are travelled by people to work and study on a daily basis. Some considered it to be a negative development. While others disagree. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

Some feel that it is impossible for a country to be economically progressive and environmentally friendly at the same time. Others disagree with this view. Discuss both points of view and give your opinion.

Improvements in health, education and trade are essential for the development of poorer nations. However, the governments of richer nations should take more responsibility for helping the poorer nations in such areas.

Some people think it's better to choose friends who always have the same opinion as them. Other people believe it's good to have friends who sometimes disagree with them. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Some people believe that women should be treated as equal to men when applying for a job with police or the military. Others think women are less suitable for this kind of job. Discuss both views and give your opinion.