Some people get into debt by buying things they don't need and can'f afford. What are the reasons for this behavior? What action can be taken to prevent people from having this problem?

#people #debt #f #behavior #action

In the contemporary materialistic world,

people

are buying stuff, even if they

does

Change the verb form

show examples

not

requires

Change the verb form

require

show examples

and getting

Change preposition

into

show examples

debt.

This

is a concerning

suituation

Correct your spelling

situation

for many families. In

this

essay, the causes and solutions of

this

topic will be illustrated. First and foremost, there are many big companies in the market, offering big deals on festivals and long weekends. When

people

came

Wrong verb form

come

show examples

accross

Correct your spelling

across

these sales, they can not resist

themself

Correct pronoun usage

apply

show examples

from

Change preposition

apply

show examples

buying stuff

Change preposition

apply

show examples

a cheaper

prices

than

marked

Correct your spelling

market

show examples

prices

However

people

end

up spending more money, than their monthly

budget

for shopping.

For example

, Bath and

body

Capitalize word

Body

show examples

exibit

Correct your spelling

offers

great offers like buy three get three free, individuals generally need one soap bottle but

end

up buying six

bottle

Change to a plural noun

bottles

show examples

. They think they have saved money, but

actually

Add a comma

actually,

show examples

they have spent multiple times more.

When

Correct word choice

Whenever

show examples

ever family

go for

Wrong verb form

goes

show examples

Remove the article

apply

show examples

shopping, they should know their monthly

budget

. They should only buy stuff they really have planned to buy before they have actually come to market for purchase. By

this

tequinique

Correct your spelling

technique

, they can analyse their needs and will not spend extra.

Moreover

, they should know that

Remove the comma

apply

show examples

sales

prices

are the

vertual

Correct your spelling

vertical

prices

manupulate

Correct your spelling

manipulate

customers to sell

thier

Correct your spelling

their

unsold items or to multiply their profits.

For example

, when

Grocerie

Correct your spelling

grocery

stores put sales on items,

people

end

up stocking for

couple

Change the article

a couple

show examples

of months . They should only buy what

their

Correct pronoun usage

they

show examples

need and their

budget

. They need to manage finances

accordingly

, If they have to save

themselve

Correct your spelling

themselves

from debt.

To conclude

, it is evident that

people

are

eassily

Correct your spelling

easily

manupulated

Correct your spelling

manipulated

by offers and

end

up purchasing more than their

montly

Correct your spelling

monthly

budget

. They should make a list before they come to market and stick with their plan.

Submitted by lovjotsandhu1 on Sun Oct 20 2024

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coherence and cohesion

Aim for better coherence in your essay by improving the logical flow between your points. Each paragraph should transition smoothly from one to the next.

task response

Ensure your main points are strongly supported with relevant examples and further analysis to reach a higher score.

overall

Proofread for minor errors in grammar and spelling to enhance clarity and make a stronger impact.

coherence and cohesion

You've introduced and concluded your argument effectively, providing a clear structure to your essay.

task response

The essay responds to both parts of the question, identifying causes and suggesting preventive actions on overspending.

task response

You provide specific examples to illustrate your points, making your argument more relatable and understandable.

Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Linking words are very important in your essay.

To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.

Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.

In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.

Linking word examples:

firstly
secondly
thirdly
in additional
moreover
also
for example
for instance
therefore
however
although
even though
despite

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Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

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6Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
4Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
29Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

281 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

Consumer culture
Conform
Societal influence
Financial literacy
Budgeting
Interest rates
Credit management
Impulsive purchases
Marketing strategies
Aggressive marketing
Emotional spending
Cope with stress
Availability of credit
Buy-now-pay-later schemes
Cycle of spending

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Some people get into debt by buying things they don't need and can'f afford. What are the reasons for this behavior? What action can be taken to prevent people from having this problem?

Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Some people think that the increasing use of computers and mobile phones for communicate had has a negative effect on young people’s reading and writing skills. To what extent do you agree with this statement?

Some school leavers choose to travel or work for a year before going university. What might be the reasons for this? What are the disadvantages of this practice?

some people say government should provide transportation for children who go to school, but some say that it is the responsibilities of parents? discuss both views and give your own views.

Some people say that advertising is extremely successful at persuading us to buy things. Other people think that advertising is so common that we no longer pay attention to it. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.