In a number of countries, some people think it is necessary to spend large sums of money on constructing new railway lines for very fast trains between cities Others believe the money should be spent on improving existing pub transport. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

In some states, some folk prosecute the idea that government should spend more money on building new
railways
for
high speed
Add a hyphen
high-speed
show examples
trains between
cities
. At the same time, others disagree with it because they think that improving public
transport
will be more
relable
Correct your spelling
reliable
relatable
.
This
essay will present why
railways
are more effective, even though their cost is higher.
While
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
public
transport
needs less money and
go
Change the verb form
goes
show examples
towards
to improve
Change the verb form
improving
show examples
infrastructure in
cities
. In terms of precipitation, public
transport
increases safety in towns and areas where it was built. It is necessary for middle and low groups of society by low
payment
Replace the word
pay
show examples
for tickets,
however
, it doesn't show any good result in the economy and uplifts aggression in public because many types of public vehicles are uncomfortable.
For instance
, my father was living in
the
Correct article usage
a
show examples
small town before there was built metro and he emphasized that
after
Correct word choice
apply
show examples
it didn't change
people
's
livestyle
Correct your spelling
lifestyle
,
however
Add the comma(s)
however,
show examples
he mentioned several moments of violence.
On the other hand
,
railways
soar the economy because they link many
cities
and improve trade between them.
Also
, it has a huge influence on
people
's lives by
making
Verb problem
creating
show examples
new jobs and reducing unemployment, even though it is unreliable at the moment and can be seen as a waste of money, it is quite profitable in the long run for
cities
and citizens.
For example
, in Europe, small
cities
have a high level of income by
railways
which
give
Correct subject-verb agreement
gives
show examples
them a chance to sell their local products on the big markets. In conclusion,
people
will have more advantages by building new
railways
, though it has minuses at the start.
While
public
transport
is less important for
cities
and has no
such
influence on
people
.
Submitted by dimash.shaitmahmet on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Coherence and Cohesion
Clarify your arguments and ensure they are logically developed with clear linkages between points.
Task Achievement
Provide more specific examples to support your points, which can aid in making your argument more persuasive.
General Advice
Check syntax and grammar to ensure clarity and precision in your response.
Task Achievement
The essay addresses both views and offers a clear opinion, satisfying the task response requirement.
Coherence and Cohesion
Includes an introduction and a well-rounded conclusion.
Coherence and Cohesion
Uses comparative language effectively, presenting both sides of the argument.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: