IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5.5

The tаble and charts below give information оп the police budget for 2017 and 2018 in опе агеа of Britain. The tаЬ/е shows where the топеу сате from and the charts show how it was distributed. Summarise the information Ьу se/ecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where re/evant

The tаble and charts below give information оп the police budget for 2017 and 2018 in опе агеа of Britain. The tаЬ/е shows where the топеу сате from and the charts show how it was distributed. Summarise the information Ьу se/ecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where re/evant
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The table and pie chart
illustrate
Change the verb form
illustrates
show examples
 data about the police budget from 2017 to 2018 over a
one year
Add a hyphen
one-year
show examples
 period in one particular place
of
Change preposition
in
show examples
United
Correct article usage
the United
show examples
 Kingdom. The table represents the money’s origin and the pie chart demonstrates the money’s distribution.
Overall
Linking Words
,the police budget came from in two years between 2017 and 2018 was from national government and local taxes,
whereas
Linking Words
 the police finances were spent on salaries and technologies mostly. It is noticeable that there was a slight growth of 2.3 m from 175.5 m to 177.8 m in the finance of
National
Correct article usage
the National
show examples
 government.
Moreover
Linking Words
,the money of local taxes rose by 11.1
million
Use synonyms
 from 91,2
million
Use synonyms
 to 102,3
million
Use synonyms
. Meanwhile,the budget from other sources like grants
were
Change the verb form
was
show examples
 approximately equal to 38.5
million
Use synonyms
 in two years. It is
an
Change the article
apply
show examples
interesting to note that there was a stable unchanged in 17% in buildings and transport in both years.
Furthermore
Linking Words
,there was a sharp increase in technology from 8% to 14% in 2018,
whereas
Linking Words
 the spending money on
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
salaries,which was the highest of all pie charts,
were
Correct subject-verb agreement
was
show examples
 down sharply falling from 75% in 2017 to 69% in 2018.

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "whereas".
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Basic structure: Change the second paragraph.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words million with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: The word "chart" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "table" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the second paragraph.
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