Surveillance cameras in bank, offices, shops and streets have been very successful in reducing crime in the work place and in public, but they are also a tool for their users to spy on people’s private business. What problems do the use of Surveillance cameras create? Are there any solution? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge.

One of the biggest problems of the technology
age
is the virtual
security
problem
. There are
security
cameras
everywhere. These
security
cameras
are not enough for other problems. My guess is that
this
problem
will be a
problem
of every
age
.
This
problem
is
a
Change the article
apply
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big because there is no definitive solution. If
software
Add an article
a software
show examples
engineer
is find
Change the verb form
finds
show examples
a solution
this
is not true because there is
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
not a solution. There are good and bad people in every
age
. Evil is the biggest
problem
in every
age
.
Although
having
security
cameras
everywhere is for people, it can have bad consequences when it falls into someone
else is
Correct your spelling
else's
show examples
hands.
For example
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
bad people can use your images in bad places. If we look at it from another angle the employer's constant surveillance of the employee is a stressful situation for the employee. The employees may constantly make mistakes
due to
stress. Everyone knows that business life is already stressful the employer
also
knows
this
and should use
security
cameras
only for
security
purposes. The psychological health of employees should be considered
as well as
security
. If we always focus on the root of the
problem
, it will be easier to solve it but we all know that it will not be easy to end the problems of the technological
age
. Not everyone should have access to
security
cameras
. If there is a
problem
, it should be checked with the police. Even if the
problem
is not completely solved, it will be at least a little difficult to reach.
Submitted by kubrairmak287 on

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coherence cohesion
In order to improve coherence and cohesion, organizing your essay into clear paragraphs with topic sentences will help guide the reader through your argument more effectively. Ensure each paragraph addresses a specific point and links smoothly to the next.
task achievement
For task response, make sure you fully address all parts of the question. Here, while the problem is discussed, solutions could be expanded upon and refined.
task achievement
Develop your ideas more comprehensively with relevant and specific examples. For instance, cite cases or statistics that illustrate the misuse of surveillance cameras.
task achievement
The essay acknowledges both the advantages and potential misuse of surveillance cameras, presenting a balanced view that enriches the discussion.
task achievement
You have included a reflection on the psychological impacts of surveillance, which adds depth to your analysis.
coherence cohesion
An introduction and conclusion are present, helping to frame and summarize your arguments, adding to the overall cohesion.

Fully explain your ideas

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    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
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    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

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