IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5

On one hand, nuclear power provides cheap and clean energy. On the other hand, nuclear weapons are a potent threat to world peace. Do the benefits of nuclear technology outweigh the risks? Give your opinion and support it with reasons.

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
Nuclear provides the lowest capital and clean waste,
however
Linking Words
, it has
potential
Correct article usage
the potential
show examples
 to be used as a
weapon
Use synonyms
 that threatens world peace. Based on those facts, I believe the benefits still outweigh the drawbacks because the world needs sustainable
energy
Use synonyms
 and the government can make policies to prevent the misuse of nuclear. First and foremost, nuclear categorized as sustainable
energy
Use synonyms
 and it is eco-friendly. Unlike other energies,
such
Linking Words
 as oils and coals, nuclear
produced
Add a missing verb
is produced
show examples
 by some atoms in the lab and not by fossils,
thus
Linking Words
, the intelligence can reproduce it.
Additionally
Linking Words
, because it does not need fires to process it, it has almost zero waste and
good
Add a missing verb
is good
show examples
 for the environment.
For example
Linking Words
, in some cities in Indonesia that
use
Use synonyms
 nuclear
as
Change preposition
apply
show examples
a power generator, the quality of water and air is better than
other
Change preposition
in other
show examples
 cities that
usecoals
Correct your spelling
use coal
 because nuclear only produces
small
Add an article
a small
show examples
 amount of waste.
As a result
Linking Words
, nuclear can be considered as an
energy
Use synonyms
 substitute.
However
Linking Words
, there are drawbacks to nuclear
such
Linking Words
 as its
use
Use synonyms
 as a
weapon
Use synonyms
. People can
use
Use synonyms
 nuclear as a bomb because it contains massive power
that is
Linking Words
 enough to damage a whole country.
For example
Linking Words
, the tragic World War Bombs in Nagasaki and Hiroshima which used nuclear, not only killed thousands of people, but the radiation can still detected in these areas until now.
Due to
Linking Words
 these facts, nuclear is dangerous if it is used as a
weapon
Use synonyms
.
To conclude
Linking Words
, nuclear is a sustainable
energy
Use synonyms
,
however
Linking Words
, it has
potential
Correct article usage
the potential
show examples
 to
Use synonyms
use
Wrong verb form
be used
show examples
 as a
weapon
Use synonyms
.
Although
Linking Words
 that, I believe that the benefits still outweigh the drawbacks because the government can prevent the misuse of nuclear by creating policies that emphasize the prohibition of nuclear weapons.

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site's author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

task achievement
Ensure to address negatives and positives with more balanced depth to achieve a complete response. Consider exploring more benefits and risks.
task achievement
Provide clearer, comprehensive ideas by elaborating further on key arguments or examples.
task achievement
Include more varied examples to support arguments, which could increase relevance and specificity.
coherence cohesion
Link sentences and paragraphs effectively to enhance logical flow of ideas throughout the essay.
coherence cohesion
Some ideas appear in an acceptable sequence. Usage of linking words and phrases like ‘furthermore,’ ‘moreover,’ etc. can improve the structure.
coherence cohesion
Develop each main point fully to support it with additional details or examples to strengthen coherence.
coherence cohesion
Introduction and conclusion are clear and present, guiding the reader through the writer’s viewpoint.
task achievement
Main points are introduced well and reflect the task prompt; benefits and drawbacks are addressed.
task achievement
Examples provided add value and drive points, like the reference to Nagasaki and Hiroshima.
What to do next:
Look at other essays: