The most important aim of science should be to improve people’s lives. To what extend do you agree or disagree with this statement

Science
is blessing
people
Change noun form
people's
show examples
lives
. sciences should improve
people
's
lives
. I agree with
this
statement. In
this
essay, I will give my opinion.
Science
is important
Change preposition
to people
show examples
people
Change noun form
people's
show examples
lives
.
people
cannot work without
science
.
People
's
life
Fix the agreement mistake
lives
show examples
fully depend on
science
.
Selence
Correct your spelling
Silence
is a big part of
people
's daily
life
.
Science
has many important goals.
First,
food
sources, and
science
can reduce
people
Change noun form
people's
show examples
hunger. By using
science
, made
food
many types. Many
type
Change to a plural noun
types
show examples
of
food
machines which is related
with
Change preposition
to
show examples
science
and technology. Many years ago
people
worked in fields with cows but today by using
science
they can use a tractor or many kinds of vehicles.
In addition
,
science
can reduce bad
effect
Fix the agreement mistake
effects
show examples
on
food
like many natural bad effects.
Secondly
,
Science
is a big part of
people
's education, without
science
education system cannot think a second.
Science
creates many technologies. One is a mobile phone . By using mobile phones students can read their important studies.
Also
, medical treatment
depend
Change the verb form
depends
show examples
on
science
. Doctors always discover new medicines and new medicines can prevent us from bad diseases like COVID-19, cancer and so on.
Science
is a useful thing for our
life
. Not only a country but
also
the world depends on
science
.
On the other hand
,
science
has many problems. Using
science
,
people
's knowledge
reduce
Wrong verb form
is reduced
show examples
day
by
day
. Because of
science
,
people
depend on
science
every single
day
.
However
,
science
does always not
good
Add a missing verb
have good
show examples
outcomes but
also
it
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
has bad things
like
Change preposition
In
show examples
many factories on
company's
Change noun form
company
show examples
important and secret information cannot be hidden. Many hackers can hack factories and famous
companies
Change noun form
companies'
company's
show examples
information. In conclusion,
Science
is a big part of our
lives
. Without
science
, we cannot think a single
day
.
Specially
Replace the word
Especially
show examples
, without
science
we cannot work.
Science
related
Add a missing verb
is related
show examples
to our
lives
. I agree with the statement.
Science
is a very important thing in our everyday
life
.
Submitted by mdtipusultanakhand on

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task achievement
To improve task response, ensure that the essay addresses all parts of the task with equal depth. It seems that the essay could benefit from exploring the 'disagree' perspective or acknowledging counter-arguments more thoroughly.
coherence cohesion
For coherence and cohesion, work on improving logical connections between ideas. Transition words and phrases can help guide the reader through the argument more smoothly.
task achievement
Provide more detailed examples to strengthen the main points. Specific examples from science that benefit and do not benefit society would provide more support to arguments.
coherence cohesion
The introduction and conclusion are clearly present, setting the scene and summarizing the argument effectively.
task achievement
The essay contains relevant points on how science impacts various aspects of life such as food production, education, and medicine.
task achievement
Multiple aspects of science and their relationship to different parts of life are mentioned, offering a broad view of the topic.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • crucial role
  • enhancing
  • quality of human life
  • advancements
  • medicine
  • healthcare
  • scientific research
  • solving societal problems
  • improving living standards
  • global issues
  • climate change
  • food scarcity
  • technological advancements
  • limitations
  • negative consequences
  • ethical considerations
  • sustainability
  • environmental preservation
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