14. A college asked its graduates to give a speech to current students about their professional careers and future opportunities. You would like to participate. Write a letter and say What do you want to talk about? Why do you think students will be interested in it Suggest a suitable date and time for your speech.
My name is Upinder Kaur and I graduated from your
collage
Correct your spelling
college
last
year. I am writing this
letter to inform you that it would be my pleasure to give speech
about Add an article
a speech
this
college and their
opportunities in Correct pronoun usage
its
Correct pronoun usage
my carrier
carrier
.
After completing study Correct your spelling
career
from
your Change preposition
at
collage
, I applied for Correct your spelling
college
the
Correct article usage
a
job
in the biggest company of
our city. Later on, they hired me as a manager of Change preposition
in
housekeeping
department. Add an article
the housekeeping
Therefore
I will explain my journey from collage
to Correct your spelling
college
get
Wrong verb form
getting
job
Add an article
a job
the job
to
Change preposition
as
the
Correct article usage
an
undergraduates
. Fix the agreement mistake
undergraduate
Morener
, I will encourage them to take part in different activities Correct your spelling
Furthermore
along with
required
programs. Students would be very Correct article usage
the required
interesting
If I Replace the word
interested
inform
them Wrong verb form
informed
all
the barriers that are faced Change preposition
of all
by
Change preposition
apply
me
Correct pronoun usage
apply
while
looking for the
Correct article usage
a
job
. They can be aware of all the problems that I faced,
when I was a student.
Remove the comma
apply
Due to
my job
schedule, It is hard for me deliver
my speech on weekdays. Luckily, My Add the particle
to deliver
vacations
has been approved by the director which starts from November 1 to November 15. Please inform me what time and date is suitable for you all Fix the agreement mistake
vacation
soon
as possible so that I can prepare myself for it.
Rephrase
as soon
your
sincerely,
Upinder KaurCorrect the word
yours
Submitted by upinder7696 on
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Coherence and Cohesion
Consider organizing the content in clear paragraphs to represent separate ideas clearly, which will enhance readability.
Task Achievement
Ensure all parts of your letter are consistently in a formal tone since you are addressing the college administration.
Greeting and Closing
The letter has a personable and warm greeting and closing, which gives it a nice touch while remaining formal.
Task Achievement
The main purpose of the letter - volunteering to give a speech - is clearly stated and well-explained with personal experiences and motivations.
The Greeting
Depending on the style and aim of the letter, you will need to adapt your greeting.
Always start an informal letter in the ways:
- Dear + name
- Hi / Hello + name
‘Dear...’ is more appropriate, so stick with this.
For a formal letter there are two options for the greeting:
- Use Dear Sir or Madam if you don’t know the name of the person you are writing to.
- Use Dear + surname if you do know their name, e.g. Dear Mr Smith or Dear Mrs Jones.