IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5.5

The diagrams below show the changes that have taken place at Queen Mary Hospital since its construction in 1960

The diagrams below show the changes that have taken place at Queen Mary Hospital since its construction in 1960
The diagram displays the changes in food consumption by Chinese people between 1985 and 2010. The graph concerns
interval
Correct article usage
the interval
show examples
 between 1985 and 2010, the minimum consumption was meat
at
Change preposition
in
show examples
 1985 and
maximum
Add an article
the maximum
show examples
 was fish
at
Change preposition
in
show examples
 2010. Fish was
most
Correct article usage
the most
show examples
 consumed food and
on
Change preposition
in
show examples
 the 15 years graph
flactuated
Correct your spelling
fluctuated
fluctuates
fluctuate
 between 600 and 700
grams
Use synonyms
 but
further
Linking Words
 rose gradually, meat
by comparison
Linking Words
 with fish did not rise that high than 200
grams
Use synonyms
,
Correct article usage
the meats
show examples
meats
Change the noun form
meat
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 graph rose slowly during that 25 years. People
consumption
Replace the word
consume
show examples
 less and less salt, consum of salt
fall
Replace the word
fell
show examples
 steadily in that 25 years from 500
grams
Use synonyms
on
Change preposition
apply
show examples
the
Correct article usage
a
show examples
 week to 200
grams
Use synonyms
on
Change preposition
apply
show examples
the
Correct article usage
a
show examples
 week.

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
▼
Common mistake: Your writing should be 150-250 words.
Vocabulary: Replace the words grams with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "changes" in your introduction.
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Vocabulary: The word "graph" was used 3 times.
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Topic Vocabulary:
  • renovation
  • expansion
  • modernization
  • facilities
  • departments
  • adjacent structures
  • patient care
  • medical technology
  • specialized centers
  • eco-friendly initiatives
  • initial layout
  • construction
  • extensions
  • improvements
  • community health services
  • capabilities
  • repurposing
  • developments
  • efficiency
  • upgrades
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