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Writing Samples
Band 6.5

The table below gives information about the daily cost of water per person in five different countries. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The table below gives information about the daily cost of water per person in five different countries. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
#information #cost #water #person #five #countries #summarise #features #comparisons
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The table below
illustrate
Change the verb form
illustrates
show examples
 data regarding the price of the
water
Use synonyms
 which a person needs during a day in five
countries
Use synonyms
.
Overall
Linking Words
, it is evident that
while
Linking Words
 the highest cost of
water
Use synonyms
 per person is in developing
countries
Use synonyms
 and people
in
Change preposition
apply
show examples
there allocate more of their
wage
Fix the agreement mistake
wages
show examples
 to
water
Use synonyms
, individuals in developed
countries
Use synonyms
 are
two
Correct article usage
the two
show examples
 least
countries
Use synonyms
 in paying for
water
Use synonyms
 each day and devote less amount of their daily wage to
water
Use synonyms
.
In
Change preposition
On
show examples
closer
Add an article
a closer
show examples
 look,
three
Correct article usage
the three
show examples
 highest
countries
Use synonyms
 in the daily price of
water
Use synonyms
 are Tanzania, Uganda and Pakistan which are 6.4 cents , 4.1 cents and 1.76 cents respectively.
Also
Linking Words
, the
water
Use synonyms
’s cost as a proportion of their daily salary
are
Change the verb form
is
show examples
 nearly 6% in Tanzania, almost 3% in Uganda and approximately 1% in Pakistan.
On the other hand
Linking Words
,
countries
Use synonyms
which
Change preposition
in which
show examples
 the cost of
water
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 is cheaper in comparison with other
countries
Use synonyms
 on the table are
UK
Correct article usage
the UK
show examples
 and
US
Correct article usage
the US
show examples
 which both dedicate almost 1 dollar per individual.
Moreover
Linking Words
, people in
there
Correct your spelling
their
show examples
countries
Use synonyms
 devote approximately 0.01% of their median daily wage for
warer
Correct your spelling
women
.
Submitted by rezaei.rezvan94 on

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words water, countries with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: The word "table" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "approximately" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "almost" was used 2 times.
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