In modern times, children are spending less time with their families and more time with their friends. Why has this change occurred? What is the solution?

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Nowadays, most
children
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prefer to spend more
time
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with friends than with
thier
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their
parents
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.
This
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phenomenon is usually observed among adolescents. Modern society has increased the difference in development level between
parents
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and
thier
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their
kids.
Although
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some families worry about
this
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,
parents
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have to balance their
time
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for help when their
children
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are well organised. Social networks have changed rapidly in the
last
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two decades, so most teenagers like to spend with classmates in
school
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. They don't rush to go
home
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after
school
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. The rationale behind
this
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is that high
school
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students have a lot of work projects that require
with
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apply
show examples
teamwork, or they want to stay beside colleagues.
For instance
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, most high
school
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students need to spend
time
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in
school
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after class in high-development countries. In a study conducted in 2022, ninety per cent of pupils go back
home
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after 9 p.m. every weekday in South Korea.
Therefore
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, it is evident that the more
children
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grow up, the less
time
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they spend at
home
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.
On the other hand
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, some
parents
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complain that their
children
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are spending less
time
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with their families and more
time
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with their peers. The reason for
this
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is that
parents
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have a lot of expectations from their offspring. Actually, they want their
children
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to be obedient to their control. Unfortunately, nowadays, it is not possible to control them when offspring grow up. A clear example of
this
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can be seen in the United States, where most students study and spend
time
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away from
home
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since they are 14 years old.
Thus
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, it is obvious that if your kids want to leave
home
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more
time
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, the family should admit them from
time
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to
time
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. In conclusion,
it is clear that
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many adolescents spend
time
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in
school
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or any public area rather than at
home
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until evening. As highlighted,
children
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usually choose their peers in modern times. The family should understand them.
Submitted by nbogey777 on

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coherence cohesion
Ensure that each paragraph has a clear main point and that supporting sentences directly relate to and develop this point further. Avoid introducing multiple ideas in one paragraph for clarity.
task achievement
While your response covers the main topic, it could benefit from more varied examples or data to substantiate your points, particularly regarding cultural or societal differences in family dynamics.
coherence cohesion
Develop a clearer thesis statement in your introduction, which concisely outlines the main arguments or ideas you plan to discuss in your essay. This will guide the reader more effectively through your response.
coherence cohesion
Your conclusion effectively summarizes the main points discussed, providing closure and reiterating the central theme of family understanding in modern times.
task achievement
The essay successfully identifies current societal changes (e.g., teamwork requirements, cultural expectations) that affect how adolescents divide their time between peers and family.
task achievement
You have used relevant examples, such as those from South Korea and the United States, to illustrate your points, adding credibility to your observations about adolescent behavior.

Answer the 'Problem and Solution' topic

Problem-and-solution essays fall naturally into two parts, the first describing and exploring the problem, the second setting out the solution or solutions.

You essay structure should look something like this:

  • Introduction
  • Body paragraph 1 – Problems
  • Body paragraph 2 – Solutions
  • Conclusion

Examples to start your body paragraph:

  • One of the first problems of the...
  • Another problem that needs to be considered...
  • A possible solution to this problem would be...
  • One immediate practical solution is to...

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • Social development
  • Peer influence
  • Educational demands
  • After-school activities
  • Parental engagement
  • Family bonding
  • Generation gap
  • Technological advancements
  • Virtual interaction
  • Work commitments
  • Balanced lifestyle
  • Community programs
  • Mutual interests
  • Technology-free zones
What to do next:
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