IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 4

There have been some problems with the bus service, especially its reliability, in your area over the last two weeks. Write a letter to the manager of the bus company. In your letter • describe what the problems are • explain how these problems are affecting you • suggest what you would like the company to do You do NOT need to write any addresses. Begin your letter as follows: Dear ...........,

#bus #service #reliability #area #two #weeks #manager #company #addresses
I'm writing
this
 email to inform regards about
bus
Correct article usage
the bus
show examples
service
 reliability
service
 in my area over the
last
 two weeks. The primary
issue
Fix the agreement mistake
issues
show examples
 I have encountered include
are
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
frequent
delay
Fix the agreement mistake
delays
show examples
, overcrowded people
in
Change preposition
on
show examples
 the
bus
,
missed
Correct word choice
and missed
show examples
service
 without any prior information to the public. These issues have had on negative impact on
daily
Correct pronoun usage
my daily
show examples
 routine, especially in my
work place
Correct your spelling
workplace
show examples
, frequently
late
Add a missing verb
being late
show examples
 for work, and missing
appointment
Fix the agreement mistake
appointments
show examples
 which increasing stress level in my work
due to
 the uncertainty and inconvenience caused by the unreliable
bus
service
. To improve the solution, I suggest the following actions 1. Provided
Add an article
an update
show examples
update
Fix the agreement mistake
updates
show examples
 to people through
Add an article
a notification
show examples
notification
Fix the agreement mistake
notifications
show examples
 in
mobile
Correct article usage
the mobile
show examples
 application 2. Implement frequent
bus
Fix the agreement mistake
buses
show examples
 in my area. 3. Regular maintenance
bus
 to avoid breakdown. I hope
implementing
Change the verb form
to implement
show examples
this
 plan to resolve the problem. I look forward to the reliable and efficient
bus
service
near
Change preposition
in near
show examples
 future. Thanks and Regards Dhivya Ravi
Submitted by dhivyaravi0396 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

greeting closing
Start the letter with an appropriate salutation, e.g., 'Dear Manager' to make it more formal.
coherence
Ensure that each paragraph contains a single clear idea and transition smoothly to the next for better coherence.
task response
Develop each point more fully to enhance the depth of task response, such as specific examples of delays.
task response
Your letter clearly outlines the problems with the bus service.
task achievement
The suggestions you offered to improve the bus service are practical and specific.
coherence
The structure follows a logical flow of describing issues, their effects, and suggesting solutions.

Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!
What to do next:
Look at other essays: