Some people today believe that the world's increase in population is unsustainable and will eventually lead to a global crisis.Other people believe that world population is necessary and beneficial as it creates the growth of the world's economy and society. Discuss both views and give your option.

#people #world #population #crisis #growth #economy #society #option

One of the widely discussed issues nowadays is

athletes

Change noun form

athletes'

athlete's

show examples

influence on

young

Correct article usage

the young

show examples

generation.It is undeniable that

athletes

has

Change the verb form

have

show examples

become an essential part of our life.

However

,there is no absolute agreement on whether

athletes

have

bad

Add an article

a bad

show examples

or good influence on young people. A commonly held belief is that

athletes

have only good

sides

.As evidence of

this

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this,

show examples

they point to discipline.

Furthermore

athletes

popularize healthy

lifestyle

Fix the agreement mistake

lifestyles

show examples

.It could be explained by the fact that sportsmen are usually disciplined people and they usually live a healthy life.It means that in general,

athletes

keep fit by eating healthy food and doing sports.

As a result

,it leads to

conclusion

Add an article

the conclusion

show examples

that they have only good

sides

On the other

hand

Add a comma

hand,

show examples

some people claim that there are certain bad

sides

about

Change preposition

show examples

athletes

that may not make

a good role models

Correct the article-noun agreement

a good role model

good role models

show examples

for

young

Correct article usage

the young

show examples

generation.

For

example

Add a comma

example,

show examples

they may

mantion

Correct your spelling

mention

that a very

big

Correct word choice

large

show examples

number of

athletes

don't mind using harmful stuff

such

as steroids and dopping and

other sort

Change the wording

another sort

other sorts

show examples

of things.

In addition

,sports persons usually get injuries and some of the injuries may cause death.The explanation lies in the fact that there are many kinds of

sport

Fix the agreement mistake

sports

show examples

that are harmful.They are usually martial arts

such

as boxing,wrestling and so on.

Therefore

, those bad

sides

of sportsmen may really affect

young

Correct article usage

the young

show examples

generation in a bad way. In conclusion, taking everything mentioned into account I would argue that young guys should divide things into bad and good and take only good from them.

Submitted by dnm.best on Sat Nov 02 2024

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relevant specific examples

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logical structure

Focus on structuring your arguments logically. Ensure each idea naturally follows from the previous one, and use linking words to enhance the flow.

clear comprehensive ideas

Aim to develop your ideas more fully. While the main points are presented, more depth and detail would strengthen your essay.

introduction conclusion present

The essay includes both an introduction and a conclusion, providing clear boundaries for your argument.

complete response

You address both sides of the argument, demonstrating a balanced view on the topic.

Word Count

IELTS says that you should write a minimum of 250 words in writing task 2. If you go under word count you will lose marks in task response.

A very long essay will not give you a higher band score.

Aim for between 260 to 290 words in writing task 2. This will ensure a concise essay and will be realistic in terms of time management. You have only 40 minutes to write the essay and you need around 10 minutes of planning time, so you will not be able to write a long essay in 30 minutes.

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9Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
17Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

236 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Some people today believe that the world's increase in population is unsustainable and will eventually lead to a global crisis.Other people believe that world population is necessary and beneficial as it creates the growth of the world's economy and society. Discuss both views and give your option.

Word Count

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

In some countries, traditional art is in facing extinction. Some people think that governments should spend some public money on its preservation. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

In the past, most working people had only one job however nowadays more and more people have more than one job at the same time. what are the reasons for this development? what are the advantages and disadvantages of having more than one job?

An increasing number of larger shopping malls, areas and departmental stores are leading to the decline number of smaller corner shops. What are the advantages and disadvantages

Now the machine is very complex, and a lot of difficult work is automated. Does this machine automation have more pros than cons?

In this technological era, personal information is stored on computers by many companies and organisations. Do you think the advantages of this outweigh the disadvantages? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.