The graphs below show the percentage of men and women aged 60-64 who were employed in four counthies in 1970 and 2000. Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant
The bar graph
provides
the Verb problem
shows
men
and women
employed in four countries over 30 year period starting in 1970.
Overall
it can be seen that the percentage of men
and women
who were employed in four countries like Belgium, USA, Japan and Austrila
, Correct your spelling
Australia
whereas
the percentages of aged 60-64 in employement
by Correct your spelling
employment
men
and women
. Further
, men
were employed for age was consistently the highest in 1970, and that
the Correct word choice
apply
women
were always the lowest but two
countries Correct article usage
the two
were
increased.
Looking at the crop data in more detail Unnecessary verb
apply
it is clear that
the percentage of men
aged 60-64 in empolyment
Correct your spelling
employment
were
about 79% and Correct subject-verb agreement
was
women
were in
lowest Change preposition
at
19
% in 1970 and 2000 in Change preposition
at 19
the
Belgium Correct article usage
apply
while
the
USA, Change preposition
in the
this
number
had increased to about 73% and 55 in 1990 and 2000, By the
Japan, the Correct article usage
apply
number
had grew
up to about 85% and 74% which were the highest employment. Change the verb form
grown
men
and women
were
employed in Unnecessary verb
apply
Austraila
Correct your spelling
Australia
were
Unnecessary verb
apply
decrased
from 76% and 47% Correct your spelling
decreased
in
1970 and 2000.
Turning to the remaining data sets, Change preposition
between
it is clear that
the number
of women
were
employed in Unnecessary verb
apply
the
Belgium Correct article usage
apply
were
Correct subject-verb agreement
was
lowest
percentage from 8% to 7% Change the article
the lowest
in
1970 to 2000. Change preposition
from
This
number
gradually climbed to about 36% in 1970, and 39% in 2000 in the USA, whereas
the
Japan Correct article usage
apply
was
slightly increased to about 43% in 1970, Unnecessary verb
apply
dropped
to 40% in 2000. Correct word choice
and dropped
Women
were
employed in Unnecessary verb
apply
the
Correct article usage
apply
Austrila
fell from 16% in 1970 to 18% in 2000.Correct your spelling
Australia
Submitted by shahinhasan5615 on
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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "it is clear that, whereas".
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Vocabulary: Replace the words men, women, number with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: The word "data" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "percentage" was used 4 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "increased" was used 3 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "about" was used 5 times.
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