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Writing Samples
Band 4

The chart below gives information about the price of tickets on one airline between Sydney and Melbourne, Australia, over a two-week period in 2013. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The chart below gives information about the price of tickets on one airline between Sydney and Melbourne, Australia, over a two-week period in 2013. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
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The given charts
illustarte
Correct your spelling
illustrate
 the price of
tickets
Use synonyms
btween
Correct your spelling
between
Sydney
Use synonyms
 and Melbourne , over a two-
week
Use synonyms
 period on
one
Use synonyms
 airline in 2013.
Firstly
Linking Words
 , the
cost
Use synonyms
 of
traviling
Correct your spelling
travelling
 in
week
Use synonyms
 1 from
Sydney
Use synonyms
 to Melbourn on a
Use synonyms
monday
Change the capitalization
Monday
show examples
 was about 80$, in the next
week
Use synonyms
also
Linking Words
 on
Use synonyms
monday
Change the capitalization
Monday
show examples
 the price of
tickets
Use synonyms
 went down to 50$
respectivly
Correct your spelling
respectively
. Other than that the
cost
Use synonyms
 of
tickets
Use synonyms
 over the
two
Add a hyphen
two-week
show examples
week
Use synonyms
 period stays the same .
Secoundly
Correct your spelling
Secondly
 the
cost
Use synonyms
 of flying from Melbourne to
Sydney
Use synonyms
 on a
Use synonyms
monday
Change the capitalization
Monday
show examples
 in
week
Use synonyms
one
Use synonyms
 was 60$ and it
decresess
Correct your spelling
decreased
 the following
week
Use synonyms
 to 40$ the same
decrese happend
Correct your spelling
decrease happened
 on
satrday
Correct your spelling
Saturday
 in
week
Use synonyms
one
Use synonyms
 it was 60$ and the
follwing
Correct your spelling
following
week
Use synonyms
 was 50$ .
Also
Linking Words
 on
Change the capitalization
Friday
show examples
friday
Add a comma
friday,
show examples
 there was a change in the
cost
Use synonyms
 of
tickets
Use synonyms
 from 80$ in
week
Use synonyms
one
Use synonyms
 to 60 $ in
week
Use synonyms
 two.
Overall
Linking Words
, the price of
ticket
Add an article
a ticket
the ticket
show examples
 from
Sydney
Use synonyms
 to Melbourn
in
Change preposition
for
show examples
 two weeks stay
costance
Correct your spelling
constant
Constance
expet
Correct your spelling
except
expert
expect
 for
Use synonyms
monday
Change the capitalization
Monday
show examples
 and for the
cost
Use synonyms
 of
traveling
Change the spelling
travelling
show examples
arournd
Correct your spelling
around
 has slight changes on
friday
Change the capitalization
Friday
show examples
,
Use synonyms
monday
Change the capitalization
Monday
show examples
,and
starday
Change the capitalization
Starday
star day
show examples
.

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "also".
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Introduction: The introduction is missing.
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Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
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Basic structure: Write more paragraphs.
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Basic structure: Add more body paragraphs.
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Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
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Basic structure: Write more paragraphs.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words tickets, sydney, one, cost, week, monday with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: The word "change" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "stays" was used 2 times.
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