IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5

The most important aim of science ought to be to improve people’s lives. To what extent do you agree or disagree? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience

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Some people prefer to have shorter
vacations
Use synonyms
 to get away from their jobs. Others like longer more than shorter.
This
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 essay explores that situation from both points of view. In contemporary life, our life is full of stress. Common sources of stress
of
Change preposition
for
show examples
 particular
individual
Fix the agreement mistake
individuals
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 stand out because of work,
about
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apply
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money,
about
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apply
show examples
bills to be paid, plans etc. A good idea to relieve that from your shoulders is to have a short rest.
Besides
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 being effective in restoring mental strength, it
also
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 has additional benefits.
For example
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, planning a long trip might be ruined by
a
Correct the article-noun agreement
apply
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simple weather conditions.
In addition
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, if you need a few days off from work, you have to use
long
Correct article usage
a long
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 vacation for that which might be unsuitable and
unconvenient
Correct your spelling
inconvenient
.
However
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, the other type of vacation, namely long,
also
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 has certain advantages. The most considerable one is that individual has more time to share for
plan
Fix the agreement mistake
plans
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 and
consequently
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 more leisure time to relax.
Also
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, it is worth mentioning, that,
while
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 it differs between people,
although
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 generally shorter
vacations
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 might not fully satisfy
need
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a need
the need
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in
Change preposition
for
show examples
 relaxation,
whereas
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 longer does.
For instance
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,
an
Correct article usage
the
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 infamous problem of emotional
burn out
Correct your spelling
burnout
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 can not be solved in
few
Correct article usage
a few
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 days
,
Remove the comma
apply
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 but requires
a
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apply
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professional assistance. In summary, both types of
vacations
Use synonyms
 have their pros and cons. As for me, I consider shorter trips to be more advantageous rather than longer ones.
However
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, it does not mean that long
vacations
Use synonyms
 are bad,
on the contrary
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, they allow you to cope with stress in the most efficient way possible.

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task achievement
Try to provide more specific examples to enhance the essay's response to the task. Using real-world examples will strengthen your argument and make your points more relatable.
coherence cohesion
Work on improving logical transitions and coherence in your writing. Ensure that each paragraph flows smoothly to the next with appropriate linking words or phrases.
task achievement
Focus on developing your ideas more clearly. Expand on each point with more detailed explanations to enhance clarity.
task achievement
The essay offers a balanced view of both shorter and longer vacations, acknowledging the benefits of each. This demonstrates a thorough understanding of the task.
coherence cohesion
The essay has a clear introduction and conclusion that frame the discussion effectively. The conclusion effectively summarizes the main points and presents a personal viewpoint.
coherence cohesion
The use of contrasting phrases, such as 'However' and 'In addition,' helps to distinguish between different perspectives effectively.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • crucial role
  • enhancing
  • quality of human life
  • advancements
  • medicine
  • healthcare
  • scientific research
  • solving societal problems
  • improving living standards
  • global issues
  • climate change
  • food scarcity
  • technological advancements
  • limitations
  • negative consequences
  • ethical considerations
  • sustainability
  • environmental preservation
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