You should spend about 20 minutes on this task. The graphs show the changes in the UK steel industry between 1970 and 2000. (million tonnes vs thousand). Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant. Value changes in UK steel industry 1970-2000. Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant. Write at least 150 words

#minutes #graphs #show #changes #uk #steel #industry #million #tonnes #thousand #information #features #comparisons #value

The given line chart illustrates the value shifts in the

steel

industry

while

the second graph shows the number of workers in

this

industry

ranging from 1970 to 2000.

Overall

, the demand for

steel

and production both decreased,

while

the

import

Fix the agreement mistake

imports

show examples

had an opposite trend during the same period. Notably, the employees in the

steel

industry

declined over a

30 years

Correct your spelling

30-year

period. To commence with, the

’s

steel

demand figure stood at 200

thousand

tonnes

in 1970.

This

number experienced a significant downfall to around 100

thousand

tonnes

by 2000.

Moreover

, the production of

steel

had the same trend as the former one, standing at approximately 170

thousand

tonnes

This

figure went down to nearly 80000 in 2000.

In contrast

, the import aspect had a gradual rise from nearly 0 in 1970 to 50

thousand

tonnes

in 1990, and by 2000,

this

figure had jumped up to around 75

thousand

tonnes

. Turning to the second graph, in 1970, 50

thousand

employees

who

Correct pronoun usage

apply

show examples

initially

worked in the

steel

industry

of the

However

this

number saw a massive drop to nearly 40

thousand

in the following 10 years.

This

trend continued to occur in the

due to

the considerable decline of workers at around 20

thousand

and approximately 18

thousand

during the same period respectively.

Submitted by elsenglish16992 on Tue Nov 05 2024

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.

▼

Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "while".

▼

Vocabulary: Replace the words uk, steel, industry, thousand, tonnes with synonyms.

▼

Vocabulary: The word "graph" was used 2 times.

▼

Vocabulary: The word "figure" was used 3 times.

▼

Vocabulary: The word "figure" was used 3 times.

▼

Vocabulary: The word "trend" was used 3 times.

▼

Vocabulary: The word "declined" was used 2 times.

▼

Vocabulary: The word "stood" was used 2 times.

▼

Vocabulary: The word "approximately" was used 2 times.

▼

Vocabulary: The word "nearly" was used 3 times.

▼

Vocabulary: The word "around" was used 3 times.

▼

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8Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
5Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
3Grammar mistakes
 

3 paragraphs

218 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 8.0

Logical structure

Single idea per paragraph

Introduction & conclusion present

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 6.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 9.0

Complete response

Suitable writing tone

Appropriate word count

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