IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5

The free movement of of goods Across national borders has long been a controversial issue. Some people argues that it is necessary for economic growth, whilst others claim that it damage local industries. Discuss with both views and gove your opinion.

#movement #goods #borders #people #growth #whilst #damage #industries #gove
✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
There is an ongoing debate over whether the goods might be exported freely through national borders. Many individuals claim that it has a devastating effect on the industry of the
country
Use synonyms
,
while
Linking Words
 I am of the opinion that it is important for the development of the
economy
Use synonyms
. On the one hand, proponents of the view believe that it damages local markets. One of the obvious
reason
Fix the agreement mistake
reasons
show examples
 is that these
products
Use synonyms
 might conquer the
Use synonyms
country
Change noun form
country's
show examples
 industry over the local
companies
Use synonyms
. As an example
coutry
Correct your spelling
country
,
like
Change preposition
in
show examples
 Azerbaijan, imported
products
Use synonyms
 hold local markets;
as a result
Linking Words
,
companies
Use synonyms
 lose in sales, resulting the
company
Change noun form
company's
show examples
 bankruptcy.
Additionally
Linking Words
,
this
Linking Words
 pattern leads to dependence
country
Use synonyms
from
Change preposition
on
show examples
overseas
companies
Use synonyms
. If
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
certain
companies
Use synonyms
 terminate an agreement with
Use synonyms
country
Add an article
the country
show examples
, it leads to
detrimental
Add an article
a detrimental
the detrimental
show examples
 effect on the
economy
Use synonyms
.
On the other hand
Linking Words
,
free
Correct article usage
the free
show examples
 movement of
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
goods can lead to increased economic growth by driving
Correct article usage
a competative
show examples
competative
Correct your spelling
competitive
 environment. When local markets consist of the many varieties of the corresponding
products
Use synonyms
, they might more cheaper prices for consumers.
Hence
Linking Words
, it fosters not only industrial development, but
it
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
also
Linking Words
increase
Change the verb form
increases
show examples
society
Change noun form
society's
show examples
 satisfaction.
Furthermore
Linking Words
, allowing free trade can create job
oppurtunies
Correct your spelling
opportunities
 in industries.
For instance
Linking Words
, global
companies
Use synonyms
 are able to open
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
new
brach
Correct your spelling
branches
show examples
 in the
country
Use synonyms
, and they hire
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
local workers which in turn
reduce
Correct subject-verb agreement
reduces
show examples
 unemployment rates.
Therefore
Linking Words
,
Use synonyms
country
Correct article usage
the country
show examples
boost
Change the verb form
boosts
show examples
 the
economy
Use synonyms
 and
decrease
Correct subject-verb agreement
decreases
show examples
 the
jobless
Replace the word
joblessness
show examples
 by leveraging the free movement of
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
global
products
Use synonyms
. In conclusion,
although
Linking Words
 open trade has a minor impact on the local market, including capturing the industry, I believe that it is an integral part of the improvement of the
economy
Use synonyms
 regarding the job creation and competition among producers.
Submitted by ilkin.abdullaev04 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

supporting main points
To strengthen your essay, ensure all ideas are fully explained with detailed supporting evidence. Try to provide additional examples or scenarios to illustrate points, particularly how local industries can adapt or gain under free trade situations.
logical structure
Work on enhancing coherence by ensuring each paragraph flows logically to the next. Clear transitions between points can enhance readability.
sentence structure
Continue to improve language accuracy and variety. Work on refining sentences to reduce grammatical errors, such as verb tense and subject-verb agreement.
balanced argument
Your essay establishes a clear stance on the issue and discusses both sides of the argument effectively, which is crucial for task achievement.
structure
The introduction and conclusion clearly present the issue and your viewpoint. They effectively frame and summarize your arguments.
content relevance
You have identified key arguments related to economic impact and market competition, which covers the main debate well.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • comparative advantage
  • economic growth
  • global markets
  • job creation
  • unemployment rates
  • consumer benefits
  • competition
  • innovation
  • technology transfer
  • international markets
  • local industries
  • business closures
  • job losses
  • cultural identity
  • consumer preferences
  • economic dependence
  • international supply chains
  • environmental impact
  • carbon emissions
  • resource depletion
What to do next:
Look at other essays: