The most importance aim of science should be to improve peoples lives to what extent do you agree os disagree with this statements.

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
It is undeniable that the advancement of
science
Use synonyms
and
technologies
Fix the agreement mistake
technology
show examples
are
Correct subject-verb agreement
is
show examples
having a major impact in various ways. Some
people
Use synonyms
believe that the play crucial role of
science
Use synonyms
is get better
Use synonyms
people
Change noun form
people's
show examples
live
Replace the word
lives
show examples
. In my opinion, I strongly agree with
this
Linking Words
topic and my reason will be present in
this
Linking Words
essay. Nowadays, The rapid spread of new
science
Use synonyms
can
makes
Wrong verb form
make
show examples
impact
Add an article
an impact
show examples
to
Change preposition
on
show examples
everything, some
people
Use synonyms
argued
Wrong verb form
argue
show examples
  that
this
Linking Words
developed
Replace the word
development
show examples
ought to
Add a missing verb
be environmental
show examples
environmental
Replace the word
environment
show examples
and biodiversity because if the world faces problems with air, water, and wind pollution, it will result for
people
Use synonyms
such
Linking Words
as diseases and living
area
Fix the agreement mistake
areas
show examples
.
Furthermore
Linking Words
, Animals or plants that are not cared for will have a wide-ranging impact on biodiversity causing many
people
Use synonyms
to lose
foods
Fix the agreement mistake
food
show examples
, clean water, and medicine.
On the other hand
Linking Words
, many
people
Use synonyms
think that technology developed by scientists plays a significant role in making life easier.
Firstly
Linking Words
, Electric cars are more widely used, since they do not emit exhaust fumes,
thay
Correct your spelling
they
have the potential to reduce urban pollution. It has
positive
Add an article
a positive
show examples
effect on the air that
human
Fix the agreement mistake
humans
show examples
breath
Replace the word
breathe
show examples
.
Secondly
Linking Words
, mobile phones are widely used in almost all countries of the world and have become a part of our daily lives, which allows us to communicate
although
Linking Words
we live far apart.
Beside
Replace the word
Besides
show examples
people
Use synonyms
can spend time working and studying
on
Change preposition
apply
show examples
online.
Moreover
Linking Words
, In many countries, buying online has become a mainstream activity. It is a great way for
people
Use synonyms
that
Correct pronoun usage
who
show examples
cannot shop in the convenience shops or the malls.
In addition
Linking Words
,
Science
Use synonyms
has invented robots to assist
human
Fix the agreement mistake
humans
show examples
in various
field
Fix the agreement mistake
fields
show examples
, whether it is, house
chore
Fix the agreement mistake
chores
show examples
, serving
a food
Remove the article
food
a portion of food
show examples
and
Correct word choice
or
show examples
be
Wrong verb form
being
show examples
a driver. In conclusion, the improvement of
science
Use synonyms
is a vital part of making human life better, which affects other aspects as well.
Submitted by theejuta.b on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

task achievement
Strengthen your main points by providing more detailed examples and explanations to support your arguments. This will help improve both coherence and task response.
coherence and cohesion
Improve logical structure by ensuring each paragraph focuses on a single idea, and transition smoothly between ideas using linking words and phrases.
task achievement
Ensure clarity and comprehensiveness of ideas by elaborating more on your points and avoiding repetitive words or phrases.
coherence and cohesion
Work on the organization of your essay by ensuring that each paragraph transition smoothly and logically leads to the next.
coherence and cohesion
Your essay clearly has an introduction and a conclusion, which shows good understanding of essay structure.
task achievement
You address multiple aspects of how science can impact human lives, which enriches the content of the essay.
task achievement
The essay attempts to consider different perspectives, which is crucial for a balanced argument.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • public health
  • technological advancements
  • living standards
  • environmental science
  • renewable energy
  • climate change
  • ethical dimension
  • theoretical physics
  • space exploration
  • practical applications
What to do next:
Look at other essays: