The charts below show the percentage of people aged 23 - 65 in different occupations in one UK town (Ashby) and in the UK as a whole in 2008. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The charts below show the percentage of people aged 23 - 65 in different occupations in

one UK town (Ashby) and in the UK as a whole in 2008.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make

comparisons where relevant.
The pie charts demonstrate occupations amongst people from the 23 to 65 age bracket in
Ashby
and
UK
Correct article usage
the UK
show examples
in 2008.
Overall
,
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
Ashby
town
had more unemployment than the whole country combined and office
work
was most popularized in
UK
Correct article usage
the UK
show examples
,
whereas
Ashby
town
was more employed by personal services. First of all, in
Ashby
town
unemployment was around 14
percent
Change the spelling
per cent
show examples
,
overall
47
percent
Change the spelling
per cent
show examples
of people were employed
by
Change preposition
in
show examples
technical , professional, shop and construction jobs. Other 18
percent
Change the spelling
per cent
show examples
of them had
work
Wrong verb form
worked
show examples
in offices and around
one fifth
Add a hyphen
one-fifth
show examples
of the total number of adults were working with professional services.
On the other hand
, in
whole
Change the article
the whole
show examples
country the most common job was related to offices and
one tenth
Add a hyphen
one-tenth
show examples
of all people had
constructive
Add an article
a constructive
show examples
job and with
same
Change the article
the same
show examples
ratio the unemployed were with
least
Correct article usage
the least
show examples
amount. Personal services were less than
town
Change preposition
in town
show examples
by 4
percent
Change the spelling
per cent
show examples
,
and
Correct word choice
apply
show examples
shop
work
was almost equal and professional and technical
work
were
Change the verb form
was
show examples
around two times more popular than in
town
.
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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "overall".
Introduction: The introduction is missing.
Introduction: Change the first sentence in the introduction.
Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
Basic structure: Change the second paragraph.
Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
Vocabulary: Replace the words ashby, town, work, percent with synonyms.
Vocabulary: Only 6 basic words for charts were used.
Vocabulary: The word "around" was used 3 times.
Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the second paragraph.

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