The charts below show the percentage of people aged 23 - 65 in different occupations in one UK town (Ashby) and in the UK as a whole in 2008. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
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The pie charts demonstrate occupations amongst people from the 23 to 65 age bracket in
Ashby
and UK
in 2008.
Correct article usage
the UK
Overall
,the
Correct article usage
apply
Ashby
town
had more unemployment than the whole country combined and office work
was most popularized in UK
,Correct article usage
the UK
whereas
Ashby
town
was more employed by personal services.
First of all, in Ashby
town
unemployment was around 14 percent
, Change the spelling
per cent
overall
47 percent
of people were employed Change the spelling
per cent
by
technical , professional, shop and construction jobs. Other 18 Change preposition
in
percent
of them had Change the spelling
per cent
work
in offices and around Wrong verb form
worked
one fifth
of the total number of adults were working with professional services.
Add a hyphen
one-fifth
On the other hand
, in whole
country the most common job was related to offices andChange the article
the whole
one tenth
of all people had Add a hyphen
one-tenth
constructive
job and with Add an article
a constructive
same
ratio the unemployed were with Change the article
the same
least
amount.
Personal services were less than Correct article usage
the least
town
by 4 Change preposition
in town
percent
, Change the spelling
per cent
and
shop Correct word choice
apply
work
was almost equal and professional and technical work
were
around two times more popular than in Change the verb form
was
town
.Submitted by Who is the best? on
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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "overall".
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Introduction: The introduction is missing.
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Introduction: Change the first sentence in the introduction.
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Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
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Basic structure: Change the second paragraph.
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Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words ashby, town, work, percent with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: Only 6 basic words for charts were used.
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Vocabulary: The word "around" was used 3 times.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the second paragraph.
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