What do you think are the causes of this? What can be done to draw people's attention to art? The government's investment in arts, music and theatre is a waste of money. Governments should invest these funds in public services instead.

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Many
government
Change to a plural noun
governments
show examples
invest most of
Correct pronoun usage
their fund
show examples
fund
Fix the agreement mistake
funds
show examples
Change preposition
in easthetics
show examples
easthetics
Correct your spelling
aesthetics
and public services for
people
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people's
show examples
usege
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use
. some
people
said
Correct article usage
a wast
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wast
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waste
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of
mony
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money
to
spent
Wrong verb form
spend
show examples
Change preposition
on easthetics
show examples
easthetics
Correct your spelling
aesthetics
esthetics
usege
Correct your spelling
usage
,
whiel
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while
government
invest
money
for
Change preposition
in
show examples
public
servise
Correct your spelling
service
It will be
benifits
Correct your spelling
benefits
.
In
Change preposition
This
show examples
this
argument is very important for us. I will argue
this
statment
Correct your spelling
statement
next paragraph.
Firstly
, THe nations are investing
money
for
Change preposition
in
show examples
arts,music and theater
develpe
Correct your spelling
development
. It is very
iportant
Correct your spelling
important
for us but
in
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apply
show examples
this
fund
will be useful
some
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for some
show examples
of persons only. All
people
are not interset in
this
Correct determiner usage
these
show examples
easthetics
events or
compatitions
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competitions
competition
but only one
this
when will give
important
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importance
show examples
for
this
it
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
skill will be
develope
Correct your spelling
developed
develop
interesting
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by interesting
show examples
people
For example
; when
government
Correct article usage
the government
show examples
fund
money
for any artist they can popular or get any national or international fermous
award
Fix the agreement mistake
awards
show examples
.
therefore
they will
farmous
Correct your spelling
famous
our country.
Moreover
,
government
Correct article usage
the government
show examples
relese
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release
fund
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funds
show examples
for many needs
however
, some needs are not
complet
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completely
public
usege
Correct your spelling
usage
use
.
therefore
,
Correct article usage
the gevernment
show examples
gevernment
Correct your spelling
government
will not
allocat
Correct your spelling
allocate
allocated
money
for
Change preposition
to
show examples
Correct article usage
the easthetis
show examples
easthetis
Change the capitalization
Easthetis
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because
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
public
Correct article usage
the public
show examples
have
Correct subject-verb agreement
has
show examples
many needs. that are infrastructural needs, road developments, water
suplly
Correct your spelling
supply
and ... many more. when needs are more they
cant
Correct your spelling
can't
spent
Wrong verb form
spend
show examples
mony
Correct your spelling
money
for
Change preposition
on
show examples
others.
For example
; many
people
have not
get
Wrong verb form
got
show examples
house
Add an article
a house
the house
show examples
for resitence It is
very
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a very
show examples
important
needs
Fix the agreement mistake
need
show examples
for them
despide
Correct your spelling
despite
the
government
do
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
not full full
this
Correct determiner usage
these
show examples
needs. In conclusion,
Correct article usage
the govenment
show examples
govenment
Correct your spelling
government
governments
invest
Correct subject-verb agreement
invests
show examples
money
for
Change preposition
in
show examples
easthetics
but
public
Correct article usage
the public
show examples
have
Correct subject-verb agreement
has
show examples
lot
Change the article
a lot
show examples
of needs so
Correct article usage
the govenment
show examples
govenment
Correct your spelling
government
will
spent
Change the verb form
spend
show examples
money
for
Change preposition
on
show examples
public needs. both
part
Change to a plural noun
parts
show examples
are very
iportant
Correct your spelling
important
but easthetiscs
are
Verb problem
do
show examples
not use all the
people
but
Correct article usage
the pulic
show examples
pulic
Correct your spelling
public
using
Verb problem
apply
show examples
needs are many
therefore
,
Add an article
the
show examples
government
will invest more
maney
Correct your spelling
money
for public
usege
Correct your spelling
usage
use
.If they use public who will get good
infrastructur
Correct your spelling
infrastructure
and
moden
Correct your spelling
modern
life
stylse
Correct your spelling
style
styles
.

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coherence cohesion
Make sure to provide clearer arguments and structured paragraphs that distinctly separate different points of view.
introduction conclusion present
Ensure that the introduction and conclusion are clearly distinct and effectively summarize the main points of the essay.
relevant specific examples
Provide more relevant and specific examples to strengthen your argument and make it more persuasive.
task achievement
The essay attempts to address both aspects of the question: the importance of arts and public services.
introduction conclusion present
You have included an introduction and conclusion, which helps organize your essay's structure.

Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Linking words are very important in your essay.

To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.

Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.

In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.

Linking word examples:

  • firstly
  • secondly
  • thirdly
  • in additional
  • moreover
  • also
  • for example
  • for instance
  • therefore
  • however
  • although
  • even though
  • despite

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • Cultural identity
  • Societal values
  • Underfunding
  • Innovation
  • Cultural diversity
  • Community engagement
  • Social cohesion
  • Necessities
  • Enrichment
  • Tourism
  • Job creation
  • Urban revitalization
  • Educational programs
  • Heritage preservation
  • Public-private partnerships
  • National culture
  • Accessibility
  • Engagement
  • Digital platforms
  • Audience demographics
What to do next:
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