11.Some people believe that parents have great influence on children’s growth but others think that influence from the outside plays more important role. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

we will
disecuss
Correct your spelling
discuss
today to of
people
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people's
show examples
views
abot
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about
the great thing if the parent
raise
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raises
show examples
childrens
Correct your spelling
children
show examples
on
the
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apply
show examples
another
Correct quantifier usage
other
show examples
hand raise the
childrens
Correct your spelling
children
children's
wath
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with
the outside
people
.
firstly
, there
is
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are
show examples
many
things
let
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that let
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the
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apply
show examples
people
think that it
better
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is better
show examples
to
Change preposition
for
show examples
the family
raise
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to raise
show examples
the
kids
,
however
they have to
lean
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learn
show examples
alot
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a lot
of
things
from as
such
as ethics ,
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and parent
show examples
parent
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parents
show examples
can shape their
kids
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kid's
kids'
show examples
development. and
the
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they
show examples
influence values ,
bihavior
Correct your spelling
behaviour
behaviours
,and emotional growth, and they guide
there
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their
show examples
kids
on the best path.
on the other hand
, there
is
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are
show examples
a lot of
people
think
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who think
show examples
that is
at
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apply
show examples
better if the
kids
raise alone with
the
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apply
show examples
outside
people
,
due to
that it
dangerous
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is dangerous
show examples
for
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them
thim
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them
in many ways,
for example
, they might choose
wrong
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the wrong
show examples
path and that will make them
not
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, not
show examples
good
people
an
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a
show examples
the
futuer
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future
,
moreover
, there is
alot
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a lot
of good
things
thay
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they
that
can learn from the good
people
,
on
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in
show examples
my opinion,
the
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apply
show examples
parent
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parents
show examples
must raise
there
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their
show examples
kids
,and
let
Verb problem
keep
show examples
the
kids
in
a
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apply
show examples
good health,and
to
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apply
show examples
have a great living life ,
a
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apply
show examples
good teaching , if the
kids
have
things
in
there
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their
show examples
life in the
futuer
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future
they will be
a
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apply
show examples
good
mans
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man
show examples
, and they will help development very
things
in the world.
last
and
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but
show examples
not least, the family have to make sure to
raised
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raise
show examples
the
kids
in front of your eyes , to see your
kids
in the
futuer
Correct your spelling
future
a
Correct your spelling
as
show examples
good
pepole
Correct your spelling
people
.
Submitted by superalialhaddad on

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task achievement
Work on providing more specific examples to support your arguments. For instance, when discussing the influence of parents, you could mention specific values or life skills that parents can teach their children.
coherence cohesion
Make sure each paragraph has a clear main idea and supporting statements. Try using clear topic sentences at the start of each paragraph to guide the reader.
task achievement
Clarify your sentences and ideas to ensure that your points are easily understood by the reader. This will improve the clarity of your argument.
task achievement
You have attempted to discuss both perspectives on the topic, which is crucial to addressing both sides of the argument.
coherence cohesion
You provided a conclusion that reflects your own opinion, which is essential in IELTS essays that ask for your viewpoint.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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